Viewer Captions


I'll get you, my pretty Joseph Wilson, and your little wife, too!!

We WILL find the WMD I sold Saddam
Say something you wish you didn't? See that flag in the background. Use it to hide behind like I do.


Why can't Zelda just leave me alone?!?

Say the Pledge, goddamnit, or I'll have you executed, so help me God!

"I did NOT sic Dr. Condie on Rumsfield!!!"

This is an ethical administration, we would never leak an undercover operative's name. Bill Clinton, on the other hand,...

Convinced Bush early on I was boss -- Remember the Pretzel-Eye.

If I've told you once I've told you a thousand times Bush is my number one front man - I never lie!

Oh yes he did have Weapons of Mass Destruction - the Easter Bunny told me so!

Where can I find that damn pusher Rush uses?

Dubya said what?

Novak was supposed to say he got Plame's name from the Dean and Clark campaigns! Why can't these stenographers get things right!

Because I SAY so...and THAT's the bottom line!

It doesn't matter what you think! The Dick says this,"I got the Iraqi oil, and there's nothing you can do about it now!" The Dick says,"Shut your mouth, and know your place! I run this country! I am the LAW!" HAHAHAHAHA!

Iraqi terrorists are a growing threat, to our re-election.

You can't prove this war wasn't right
Evidence? We don't need no stinking evidence!

Read my Bush, no new lips!

I can't believe I ate the whole thing.

Me, profit from Iraq? Why would someone accuse a noble person such as myself of such evil deeds?

How many times do I have to tell you. Mary Matalan did not quit because I'm incompetent but because I have a mechanical heart!

I am getting how much of a raise from Haliburton? Jason

All Hat No Cattle really tightens my jaws.


blah blah blah blah blah world domination blah blah blah end of the arab race blah blah blah theft of oil blah blah blah end of the democratic party blah blah blah

"argh" these guys want answers to everything.
i asked for whole ounce. this is only a half.

my name is not pat robertson

"I've got your Halliburton right here, pal!"
Eric Maietta

"When we decide which country we're going to invade next, we'll let you know!"
Eric Maietta

"We are adding the word 'Halliburton' to the official list of words that can't be mentioned in these press conferences!"
Eric Maietta

"I don't care what anyone says. I have never had my head simonized!"
Eric Maietta

"No, I will not be playing Daddy Warbucks in a remake of 'Orphan Annie'!"
Eric Maietta

"Saddam had WMDs because we say he did, damn it!"
Eric Maietta

"Dopey, uh, I mean Dubya will hold a press conference when he's darned well good and ready!"
Eric Maietta

"Will you please stop calling me 'Mister President'!"
Eric Maietta

"Yes, I do support everyone's First Amendment right to free speech and anyone who says I don't is a no-good, low-down traitor!"
Eric Maietta

"No, I don't know who leaked that C.I.A. agent's name. Personally, I think it was O.J. Simpson!"
Eric Maietta

"No, I am not upset at the number of our troops that have died since the President announced the end of formal hostilities in Iraq. People die every day! Didn't you know that?"
Eric Maietta

This country needs an oil change!

How many times do I have to tell you?
I've said it before, and I'll say it again: We are fighting this evil in Iraq so we do not have to fight it in the streets of our own cities!

I wish these stones would hurray up and pass!

Halliburton PAY for helping itself to Iraqi oil? NAAAAAAAWWWW. That's what American chumps er I mean taxpayers are for! Iraqi-Texas tea for ChimpBoy and me! HOT DAMN!!!

Friggin' hemorrhoids!!!

We have to stay in Iraq now, at least until a couple barrels of crude come my way.
My Poly-Grip just let loose!

I am not a crook.

Limbaugh gave me some of that %#&*@% Oxycontin and now I'm seeing double!
For Christsakes George!! Take off that damned Flight Suit!!!!

Im getting tired of telling you George! Dont think! Just do what I tell you!!!

I did not have financial relations with that company...

... and that's why the liberals... damn, my heart stopped again.