Tuesday edition - May 11, 2010





Oil spill testimony to Congress: Not our fault

AP – 5-11-10
AP WASHINGTON - BP PLC told Congress Tuesday its massive Gulf oil spill was caused by the failure of a key safety device made by another company.


Halliburton's murky name resurfaces after Gulf of Mexico oil spill
New York Daily News - Denis Hamill -5-11-10
And, as we all know, the odious company that made Dick Cheney super rich. The same company that received exclusive no-bid government contracts for almost

Troops, inmates try to protect coast as executives face Congress

Reuters – 5-11-10
PORT FOURCHON, La./WASHINGTON (Reuters) – Troops using helicopters and bulldozers, helped by prison inmates, rushed to shore up Louisiana's coast against a huge oil slick on Tuesday as oil company executives traded blame in Washington over what could be the worst spill in U.S. history.


I wonder how long before BP declares bankruptcy and the US is left with cleaning up their mess? Maybe we should ask the Queen to pitch in and help.



"This oil spill in the Gulf is affecting everybody. In fact, when I went to lunch this weekend and ordered the sea bass, they asked if I wanted it regular or unleaded." –David Letterman



The-World-Will-Be-A-Safer-Place-Without Saddam



Obama’s What???
By Madeleine Begun Kane

“Obama’s Katrina,” they say.
“Obama’s H. Miers,” they pray.
To the wingnuts give thanks
For reminding the ranks
Of the many ways Bush went astray.






"There's speculation that the 1,000-point drop in the Dow may have been sparked by a typo, where someone entered 'billion' instead of 'million' on a trading order. Economists are saying a single letter hasn't caused this many problems since the letter 'W.'" –Jimmy Fallon


Disturbing News


"The Arizona government is very defensive about its new immigration law. They are being accused of just looking for Mexicans. The Arizona government says, 'No, earlier today we were rounding up Germans.'" –David Letterman






Republican-Shenanigans News


"At first the Taliban claimed credit and then as the week went on and we found out about this guy they said, 'No, we have nothing to do with him.' … The Taliban said, 'The next time we want to wreak mass destruction on America, we'll hire BP.'" –Bill Maher, on the failed Times Square terrorist bombing



When All Else Fails, Just Make Stuff Up



Elisabeth Hasselbeck has some explaining to do.

During last week's "The View," the conservative co-host gave a teary apology to ESPN sportscaster Erin Andrews after criticizing her skimpy wardrobe on "Dancing with the Stars."

Hasselbeck, 32, claimed that she called Andrews Tuesday night to personally apologize after her 5-year-old daughter, Grace, advised her to just pick up the phone.

"Thankfully, I listened to her … and I did," she did.

However, the only problem is that Hasselbeck never made the call.

Rock-The-Voter News



The Demise Of American Democracy and Culture


Novelist Peter Carey warns against the demise of American democracy and culture in his latest book, targeting what he sees as factors that have led to rise of the conservative Tea Party movement.

"Parrot and Olivier in America" is a fictional re-imagining of Alexis de Tocqueville's journey to America in the early 1800s, during which the French political thinker examined the roots of America's democracy.

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Biz-Tech News


"I love you Greece, but your retirement age is 54. Really? Greek people in America work the register at the diner til they die." –Tina Fey, on SNL's "Weekend Update




Bush-Prison-Torture News


"One guy can do a billion dollar transaction and a manager doesn't have to approve it? If I try to pay with a $50 at Starbucks, it turns into a four man operation." -Amy Poehler, on the dramatic dropping of the Dow, SNL's "Weekened Update'



Go-F**k-Yourself News


"Rick Perry says the oil leak  was an act of God. I think it was an act of Dick Cheney." - Bill Maher





 Only $515 to reach my goal


Thank you Michael, Chris and Stephen!

Offline Donation - Lisa Casey - PO Box 88 - Ashford, AL 36312


Lisa Casey
Apartado Postal 79
Santa Cruz, Guanacaste 5150
Costa Rica


 Email me lisa@allhatnocattle.net

Odd News

To Help You Deflate Photo



Lebanese chefs celebrate around the largest plate of hummus after setting a new Guinness world record in Beirut, Lebanon on Saturday claimed another victory in the continuing battle with Israel over which country can make the largest plate of the chickpea delicacy hummus -- with a 10-tonne broadside.
Photo/Anwar Amro




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