Tuesday edition - May 11, 2010
AP – 5-11-10
Halliburton's murky name resurfaces after Gulf of Mexico oil spill
I wonder how long before BP declares bankruptcy and the US is left with cleaning up their mess? Maybe we should ask the Queen to pitch in and help.
spill in the Gulf is affecting everybody. In fact, when I went to lunch this
weekend and ordered the sea bass, they asked if I wanted it regular or
unleaded." –David Letterman
By Madeleine Begun Kane
“Obama’s Katrina,” they say.
“Obama’s H. Miers,” they pray.
To the wingnuts give thanks
For reminding the ranks
Of the many ways Bush went astray.
speculation that the 1,000-point drop in the Dow may have been sparked by a
typo, where someone entered 'billion' instead of 'million' on a trading order.
Economists are saying a single letter hasn't caused this many problems since the
letter 'W.'" –Jimmy Fallon
Arizona government is very defensive about its new immigration law. They are
being accused of just looking for Mexicans. The Arizona government says, 'No,
earlier today we were rounding up Germans.'" –David Letterman
the Taliban claimed credit and then as the week went on and we found out about
this guy they said, 'No, we have nothing to do with him.' … The Taliban said,
'The next time we want to wreak mass destruction on America, we'll hire BP.'"
–Bill Maher, on the failed Times Square terrorist bombing
When All Else Fails, Just Make Stuff Up
Hasselbeck has some explaining to do.
During last week's "The View," the conservative co-host gave a teary apology to ESPN sportscaster Erin Andrews after criticizing her skimpy wardrobe on "Dancing with the Stars."
Hasselbeck, 32, claimed that she called Andrews Tuesday night to personally apologize after her 5-year-old daughter, Grace, advised her to just pick up the phone.
"Thankfully, I listened to her … and I did," she did.
However, the only problem is that Hasselbeck never made the call.
The Demise Of American Democracy and Culture
Novelist Peter Carey warns
against the demise of American democracy and culture in his latest book,
targeting what he sees as factors that have led to rise of the conservative Tea
"Parrot and Olivier in America" is a fictional re-imagining of Alexis de Tocqueville's journey to America in the early 1800s, during which the French political thinker examined the roots of America's democracy.
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"I love you Greece, but your retirement age is 54. Really? Greek people in America work the register at the diner til they die." –Tina Fey, on SNL's "Weekend Update
can do a billion dollar transaction and a manager doesn't have to approve it? If
I try to pay with a $50 at Starbucks, it turns into a four man operation."
-Amy Poehler, on the dramatic dropping of the Dow, SNL's "Weekened Update'
"Rick Perry says the oil leak was an act of God. I think it was an act of Dick Cheney." - Bill Maher
Only $515 to reach my goal
Thank you Michael, Chris and Stephen!
Offline Donation - Lisa Casey - PO Box 88 - Ashford, AL 36312
Apartado Postal 79
Santa Cruz, Guanacaste 5150
Email me email@example.com
To Help You Deflate Photo
chefs celebrate around the largest plate of hummus after setting a new Guinness
world record in Beirut, Lebanon on Saturday claimed another victory in the
continuing battle with Israel over which country can make the largest plate of
the chickpea delicacy hummus -- with a 10-tonne broadside.
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