Mississippi better buy more condoms
and less Ding Dongs.
"Well, listen to this. Here's some good terrorist gossip. According to a Sudanese novelist who once lived with Osama bin Laden for four months, Osama bin Laden is a huge Whitney Houston fan which is surprising. I mean, considering the way those people treat women, you'd think he'd be a bigger Bobby Brown fan." --Jay Leno
The-World-Will-Be-A-Safer-Place-Without Saddam
Slipper Thrower Shot
American Marines shot and wounded an Iraqi man in the former flash point city of Fallujah believing he was throwing a grenade at them, the U.S. military said Thursday — but local police and witnesses said the object was only the man's slipper.
"Osama bin
Laden has released yet another new audiotape. See, they're audiotapes. I don't
think he quite gets the Twitter thing. He can't — he doesn't have the opposable
thumb, I guess." --Jay Leno
Disturbing News No Protection For Journalists
A bill to give journalists a limited right to protect confidential sources from disclosure was sidetracked Thursday, after senators from both parties said the current version could damage national security.
"In
Connecticut — this is weird — one of the Republican candidates running for
Congress is the former CEO of the W.W.E. wrestling organization, which could be
good. Congressmen will be less likely to scream out, 'You lie!' if they could
get hit with a folding chair." --Conan O'Brien
Republican-Shenanigans News
Values Voters Summit
Nearly 2,000 social
conservative activists from 49 states gather for a Values Voters Summit in
Washington Friday and Saturday, but movement favorites former Gov. Sarah Palin
and former House Speaker Newt Gingrich will not be addressing the throng.
"Wait,
have you heard about this? Oh, I love this. They have new House rules saying
members of Congress cannot call the President a liar. They cannot call him a
hypocrite. They cannot say he is dishonest. Today, President Bush said, 'Hey,
where were these rules when I was President?'" --Jay Leno Rock-The-Voter News
"I've always been a Republican for the traditional principles that have been associated with the Republican party since I became a Republican, when I registered to vote. And that is limited government, individual opportunities, fiscal responsibility, and a strong national defense. So I think those principles have always been a part of the Republican party heritage. And I believe that I reflect those views and I haven't changed as a Republican. I think more that my party has changed."- Senator Olympia Snowe
Cuba/USA Mail?
U.S. and Cuban officials met on Thursday to discuss the possibility of resuming long-suspended direct mail service in a first round of talks that Cuba described as "broad and useful."
"Hey, if
they start banning hypocrites and liars from the floor of Congress, there won't
be anybody in the building." --Jay Leno
Ads by Google
Biz-Tech News
Swine Flu
Airline employees who report to work ill are more likely than sick passengers to spread infections such as the H1N1 swine flu virus aboard airplanes, with low-paid workers posing the greatest danger, a U.S. government expert said on Thursday.
'Yesterday, Federal Reserve chairman Ben Bernanke said it is 'very likely' that
the recession is over. I hope this isn't like when President Bush told us the
war in Iraq was over.' –Jimmy Kimmel
Bush-Prison-Torture News
The Tea Party Express is aiming for a billion-person turnout. Thanks to Photoshop, I'm sure they'll get it. - Grant Gerver, www.seriouskidding.com
The New Gitmo
Now it looks as if Congress is trying to derail health care reform on a bipartisan basis. So nice to see them working together. – Will Durst
Go-F**k-Yourself News
Actually, priests in the Catholic Church don't take a vow of poverty, they saved that for the nuns.
Did you have a good time today?
If you can, p lease support All Hat No Cattle
A big thanks to Marilyn, Mark and Leslie!
Offline Donation - Lisa Casey - PO Box 88 - Ashford, AL 36312
Odd News To Help You Deflate Photo
Buddha shaped pears are seen in an orchard in Weixian county, Hebei province, China, September 10, 2009. Hao Xianzhang, a local famer, spent six years to perfect the process by growing the pears inside molds, local media reported. The pears cost around 50 yuan (7.32 USD) each. Photo/Pillar Lee
I wish you all a peaceful weekend.
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