Wednesday edition - August 13, 2008





Georgian villages looted as conflict ceasefire threatened
AFP - 8-13-08
GORI, Georgia (AFP) - Separatist fighters and Russian troops looted and set homes ablaze in Georgian territory on Wednesday amid fears over a fragile ceasefire that ended five days of bitter conflict.

McCain, Georgia and Lobbying
Washington Post - 8-13-08
John McCain's strong anti-Russia comments on the Georgia situation and the fact that his top foreign policy adviser is part owner of a lobbying firm that provides strategic advice to the Georgian government in Washington have produced a surge of

Obama, McCain split on Georgia crisis
International Herald Tribune, France - 8-13-08

AP WASHINGTON: Democrat Barack Obama and Republican John McCain issued dueling statements about Russia's invasion of American-allied Georgia


Putin abruptly left the Olympics to deal with the Georgia/Russia crisis. Bush stayed at the Olympics and hung out with the athletes. Enough said.



"Bush did sit down with the premiere Olympic sportscaster of all time, Bob Costas, to discuss what he thought was so weird about the invasion [on screen: Bush saying he thought it was odd Russia invaded Georgia during a time when the world is promoting 'peace and harmony,' and that there needs to be 'international mediation there']. Yes. Sometimes international mediation can solve conflicts. That's President Bush winning the preliminary heat in the 200 meter lack of self-awareness dash [on screen: Bush saying America doesn't seem to have any problems]. I think that might be our biggest problem." --Jon Stewart



The-World-Is-A-Safer-Place-Without Saddam


"You know, he really is adorable. He shouldn't be our president. He should be our mascot." --Jon Stewart, watching Bush at the Olympics


Privatizing the Military Sure Has Worked Out Well, Huh?


The United States is spending roughly one-fifth of funds for the war in Iraq on private contractors, according to a report issued by the Congressional Budget Office on Tuesday.


Disturbing News



The Airlines Should Charge the Pentagon


Some airlines are charging U.S. soldiers extra baggage fees to take their military kits with them as they set off for war.








Republican-Shenanigans News


"It turns out the Chinese faked part of the opening ceremonies. They made the fireworks look more lively. It's the same technology they use for John McCain." --Craig Ferguson




Not Gonna Happen


Talk of Republican Sen. Chuck Hagel as a potential running mate for Democratic candidate Barack Obama tends to confound partisans in both parties.


Rock-The-Voter News


 John McCain has been accused of stealing policy ideas from Wikipedia, which is ridiculous! Everybody “knows McCain doesn’t know how to use the Internet, so how could you even accuse him of that? - Craig Ferguson




"John Edwards, presidential aspirant and author of the famed claim that there are two Americas, was apparently only faithful to his wife in one of them. Apparently he didn't realize that the National Enquirer had reporters stationed in the other America, where he was, in fact, banging his videographer." --Jon Stewart (Watch video clip)



Biz-Tech News


If John McCain becomes President, I'm drinkin' Cindy's beer, and lots of it. - Grant Gerver




Bush-Prison-Torture News


The number 1 job in America: contractor in Iraq. Where do I sign up? - Grant Gerver




Money, Sex and Politics


Former presidential candidate John Edwards knew his ex-mistress, Rielle Hunter, was receiving payments from his former campaign finance chairman, according to the National Enquirer, the publication that broke the story of Edwards' affair.

What's more, says the Enquirer, it has "uncovered that Edwards' political operatives are still paying" Hunter.



"According to rumors, John McCain and Barack Obama are trying to get Angelina Jolie’s endorsement for the campaign, and John Edwards is just trying to get her number." --Craig Ferguson

Go-F**k-Yourself News


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Odd News



Tallan 'T-Man' Latz performs Monday, June 30, 2008, at Summerfest in Milwaukee. A blues guitar prodigy, the 8-year-old has played in bars and clubs, including the House of Blues in Chicago, and even jammed with Les Paul and Jackson Browne. However, the state of Wisconsin says that Tallan cannot play in taverns and nightclubs because of state child labor laws.
Photo/Morry Gash