President Bush told reporters Tuesday that Condi Rice is handling all phone calls to U.S. allies and brokering the Lebanon cease-fire. He's kicking back in the easy chair while Condi does all the work. And people say he's not really a Southerner. ---- comedian Argus Hamilton

The only scheduled debate between the Republican candidates for Senate turned into a mud-slinging match last night when Kathleen (KT) McFarland accused her opponent, John Spencer, of philandering and nepotism.
"John, the problem with you is that you are like the Clintons: You've taxed and spent like Hillary and you've behaved like Bill," McFarland said.
"We are considering sending every voter a copy of that debate," crowed Howard Wolfson, spokesman for Sen. Hillary Clinton.

A laptop computer used by the Department of Transportation to combat fraud was stolen in Doral last month, putting the sensitive personal information of almost 133,000 Florida residents at risk of the criminal activity the agency was trying to guard against.

Social Security numbers, birth dates and addresses were on the laptop assigned to a special agent in the Miami office when it was stolen from a government-owned vehicle

The government said it may have to dip into the strategic petroleum reserve. That oil is only to be released to the public in an emergency. You know, like at election time. -- Jay Leno
 

"Yesterday the company BP announced that it's shutting down its Alaska pipeline after a spill revealed some corrosion. The shutdown means the cutoff of 8% of our domestic oil supply and another uptick in the prices, because you know summer was just too awesome. You all remember BP, they're the cool oil company, their slogan is beyond petroleum because apparently that can leak. BP even invites their customers to speak to them. Oh, I have a question. Hey, you know that main pipeline that connects your product to the U.S. mainland. You ever check that?." --Jon Stewart

“Here's an odd story -- a candidate for the president of the Congo has called a press conference to deny that he is a cannibal and said he has never eaten any pygmy. That's what he said. Finally, a candidate who cares about the little people.” -- Jay Leno

1993 - A massive deficit-reduction bill was signed into law by U.S. President Bill Clinton.

1994 - U.S. President Clinton claimed presidential immunity when he asked a federal judge to dismiss, at least for the time being, a sexual harassment lawsuit filed by Paula Corbin Jones.

1995 - Timothy McVeigh and Terry Nichols were charged with 11 counts in the Oklahoma City bombing.

2003 - Ekaterina Dmitriev and Russian cosmonaut Yuri Malenchenko were married. Malenchenko was about 240 miles above the earth in the international space station. It was the first-ever marriage from space.

	Web allhatnocattle.net

Click here to support All Hat No Cattle