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All Hat No Cattle laughs at people pretending to be something they're not. Toons and funny one liners to lessen the hard right blows.

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Tuesday edition - July 5, 2011



Financial Reform: Republicans Fight To Dilute Wall Street Regulations

President Barack Obama's financial overhaul law is nearly a year old. For congressional Republicans, the fight to weaken it is just starting.

Hackers falsely claim Obama dead on Fox Twitter feed

 Hackers took control of a Twitter account on Monday and sent six false tweets saying that U.S. President Barack Obama had been shot dead, prompting an investigation by the Secret Service

Secret Service to probe hack on Fox News Twitter

The Secret Service said Monday it will investigate the hacking of Fox's political Twitter account over updates claiming that President Barack Obama had been assassinated.


How is Wall Street patriotic? They helped get us in to this horrible economy and they are fighting increasing ANY taxes.




We’re celebrating our independence from the British. I hope that in a couple years, we’ll be able to celebrate our independence from the Chinese- David Letterman





North Korea has shut down all of its universities for 10 months so students can work in factories. Or, as they call it in North Korea, “spring break.”- Conan


Another Historically Challenged Politician


India's health minister has derided homosexuality as an unnatural "disease" from the West, drawing outrage Tuesday from activists who said the comments set back the country's campaign for gay rights and its fight against HIV.


The Senate canceled their vacation to work on the budget. Either they really can’t agree or they’re looking for an excuse to not go on vacation with their families.- Jimmy Kimmel

Republican Shenanigans

Glenn Beck Moves To George W. Bush's Neck Of The Woods


New Yorkers better get their heckling in fast, because Glenn Beck is headed for the Lone Star State.

The TV host and commentator recently sold his New Canaan, Conn., mansion, to Maura Abeln Smith, recently named general counsel of PepsiCo, for $3.6 million. The listing agent, Lynne Leonard, confirmed Beck was headed to Texas.

"They are going to the Dallas area," Leonard told the Daily News. "They will be renting. It's secure and gated."





California officials say that the census failed to count over a million residents of the state? How did Schwarzenegger manage to cover up all those children? - Conan


Rock-The-Voter News



Rev. Pat Robertson says that if more states legalize gay marriage, God will destroy America. He did say that afterwards, gays will come in and do a beautiful renovation.

- Conan





A DUI, Viagra and A Republican


A Cincinnati-area state representative was caught in a firestorm of criticism on Thursday over revelations surrounding a traffic stop this spring that resulted in his arrest on a drunken driving charge... his blood alcohol content was registered at 0.097 percent, according to the documents. A toxicology screening also picked up Viagra and another pharmaceutical drug in his system.

The third-term Republican ...


Top Ten Reasons I, Dave Letterman, Am Proud To Be An American

10 The complimentary TSA groping

9 Other countries don't have one Dakota — we have two

8 Land of the free, home of the brave, and the fattest people on Earth

7 Our wise and learned Founding Fathers, such as Thomas Jefferson and John Quincy Gotti (joke provided by Michele O'Bachmann)

6 All our presidents were born in America . . . or possibly Kenya

5 The United States has the best extreme couponers in the world

4 We live in a country where our politicians text photos of their junk

3 Forget all this, have you seen the news story about Florence Henderson?

2 Kim Kardashian X-rayed her butt

1 What other country would let me get away with doing this crap?





Business News


Ah, the 4th of July. Great holiday. Let's drink a lot of beer and handle explosives. A date that is the source of many nicknames, like Lefty & Patch.- Will Durst




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Odd News




NASA  photo of Space Shuttle Atlantis in orbit.




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"Lisa, Congrats on your sweep! As George Bush might have said, 'Lucky me, I hit the trifecta.' Seriously, I'm glad to be able to salute you and all the great laughs you provide." - Daniel Kurtzman, Guide to Political Humor.







Daily Frontpage   Archives     You might be a right wing Republican if..What Liberal Media?   Republican Presidential Quotations   Bush-Cheney Political Contributions   Cream of the Crop Links  T-Shirts, Mugs and More    Please donate so I can put food on my family  Subscribe to AHNC About AHNC   Advertise on All Hat No Cattle  Contact me  Copyright Notice

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