TGIF/Weekend edition - July 4-6, 2008





CNN poll: Most say Founding Fathers wouldn't be impressed
CNN - 7-4-08
(CNN) -- How would the likes of Thomas Jefferson and Benjamin Franklin feel about the way the United States has turned out 232 years after declaring its independence?

Vanderbilt study finds Iraq war hurt Republican, not Democratic ...
Vanderbilt University News, TN - Jul 3, 2008
This fall Democratic campaign strategists might want to target traditionally Republican congressional districts with heavy casualties in Iraq, according to

State denies it pushed for Texas-Iraq oil deal
The Associated Press - 7-4-08
WASHINGTON (AP) - The State Department on Thursday denied charges by a House committee that it inappropriately encouraged a Texas-based oil company to


Happy Fourth of July, everybody: a good day to Declare one's Independence from the government, if only in spirit. - Grant Gerver,




The-World-Is-A-Safer-Place-Without Saddam

Condi Is Proud Of Invading Iraq



 Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice said she's ``proud'' of the U.S. decision to wage the Iraq war and insisted that the world is not more dangerous than it was when George W. Bush took office.





Who gives a damn if there's life on other planets? IS THERE OIL?!  - Grant Gerver,



Disturbing News


YouTube order: Does it threaten your privacy?
San Jose Mercury News




Mike Malloy - The Declaration Of Independence







Republican-Shenanigans News


“President Bush has said he has no plans to invade Iran,” he said. “He will still invade — he just has no plans.” - Jay Leno




Bush builds secret golf course on Crawford ranch - Grant Gerver,


Which Republican Is Lying?



McCain, meanwhile, was unexpectedly put on the defensive at a news conference in Cartagena, Colombia, on Wednesday, when he was forced to respond to a claim by a Republican Senate colleague that the presidential candidate had roughed up an associate of Nicaragua's leftist President Daniel Ortega two decades ago.

"Simply not true," McCain said of the allegation by Mississippi Republican Sen. Thad Cochran.






"John McCain shook up his campaign Wednesday and hired Arnold Schwarzenegger's campaign manager, Steve Schmidt. He's just what the candidate needs. Anybody who can make a Republican out of a Hollywood actor might make a Republican out of John McCain."- Argus Hamilton

Rock-The-Voter News



Biz-Tech News

Poles Vault


Poland spurned as insufficient on Friday a U.S. offer to boost its air defenses in return for basing anti-missile interceptors on its soil but said it remained open to talks with Washington.




Mr. Clinton better watch out if he comes down here. He'd better have a bodyguard.  Senator Jesse Helms (R-NC) threatening the president of the United States in 1994 died on July 4, 2008


Bush-Prison-Torture News


Men's Health released a report Monday urging men to have an active sex life as they grow older. It says middle-aged men who have sex once a month are much less likely to die suddenly. However, the chances increase if their wives find out about it.- Argus Hamilton


Go-F**k-Yourself News



All Hat No Cattle CD review:

“Songs of the Bushmen” by Harry Shearer


Comedic actor, writer, director and musician Harry Shearer’s new CD lampooning the Bush administration is well worth checking out. And don’t just take our word for it.

The right wing already is recoiling with self-righteous horror at Shearer’s musical dissection of Dubya and his crew. Billboard ads for Shearer’s just-released “Songs of the Bushmen” have been refused by Clear Channel – the arch-conservative radio station and outdoor advertising conglomerate – because the CD cover features President Decider with a bone through his nose. How’s that for an endorsement?

To gauge political or cultural hot buttons here at All Hat No Cattle, we occasionally utilize the CAST Barometer (Conservatives Are Soiling Themselves): If the far right finds something particularly objectionable, it’s often because there is an intrinsic truth or some highly redeeming social value to the statement or issue. Using the CAST Barometer, “Songs of the Bushmen” registers 8.2 on a 10-point scale because it really pisses off neo-cons with some inconvenient truths.

Here are a few lyrical tidbits from Shearer’s tribute to Bush and his legacy.
A think tank did the counting
The numbers still could rise
Total what we were told before the war: 935 lies …
Couple hundred thousand Iraqis
Said their early goodbyes
It’s the gift that keeps on giving, thanks to 935 lies
-- selections from “935 Lies”, a bluesy piece (and our personal favorite) about the Bush Administration’s illegal war

He was the soul of loyalty
Wouldn’t even look at a drink
Now it’s the reward of royalty
Scooter’s skatin’ past the clink …

No cooler for the Scooter
In a way that was the point,
He’s still free to bend over
Scooter’s rescued from the joint
-- selections from “No Cooler for the Scooter”, a soft jazz rendition on the prison pardon granted to vice presidential hatchet man Scooter Libby after his felony conviction

Karen do they love us again?
Do they see Uncle Sam as their friend?
Does their heart swell with pride
Knowing God’s on our side?
Is the whole hatred thing on the mend?
-- from “Karen”, a lilting country ballad dedicated to former White House Communications Director Karen Hughes

“Songs of the Bushmen” contains seven other songs, each dedicated to a different player in the administration:
"Gym Buds" (Condoleeza Rice)
"Stuff Happens" (Donald Rumsfeld)
"Wolf on the Run" (Paul Wolfowitz)
"Turd Blossom Special" (former Karl Rove)
"Carrot Soup" (John Bolton)
"Who Is Yoo" (John Yoo)
"Smooth Moves" (Colin Powell)

“Songs of the Bushmen” was released July 1 by Courgette Records on digital platforms including iTunes and Amazon. The CD is a follow-up to Shearer’s release last year of “Songs Pointed and Pointless”, which was nominated for a Grammy for best comedy album. Although his latest musical effort seems headed for similar success, Shearer admits to a twinge of regret over the imminent departure of the Bush Administration because it will be “sorely missed by comedy writers everywhere.”



"Songs of the Bushmen."  See it here.



About Harry Shearer

Harry Shearer is best known to millions worldwide over the past two decades because of his voice work on The Simpsons television show, in which he plays the characters Mr. Burns, Smithers, Ned Flanders, Rev. Lovejoy and Scratchy.
The Los Angeles native entered the entertainment industry in his teens with guest appearances on TV shows including The Jack Benny Program, General Electric Theatre and Alfred Hitchcock Presents.
In 1968, Shearer joined a news satire team at KRLA-AM called The Credibility Gap, which developed a strong fan following with comedy such as alternative live commentaries on the annual Rose Parade in Pasadena. The Gap crew formed a band to play local clubs and eventually recorded a number of comedy albums.
In the early 1980s, Shearer and friends Michael McKean and Christopher Guest, along with director Rob Reiner, began to incubate an idea for a fake documentary about an aging heavy metal band. The resulting movie, This Is Spinal Tap, became the granddaddy of the “mockumentary” genre.
Shearer's other film credits include Real Life, The Right Stuff, Portrait of a White Marriage, The Fisher King, Godzilla, The Truman Show, Small Soldiers, A Mighty Wind, and For Your Consideration.
On TV, he has been a regular cast member on Saturday Night Live during two different time spans.
Theatrically, Shearer has collaborated with writer Tom Leopold and composer Peter Matz to create the book and lyrics for an original musical about J. Edgar Hoover titled J. Edgar!: The Musical. The play premiered at The Aspen Comedy Festival and currently is being developed for Broadway.
On radio, Shearer's one-hour satirical sandbox Le Show is heard weekly on stations worldwide.
In 2006, Shearer released his first novel, Not Enough Indians (Justin, Charles & Company). The book takes a darkly comic look at the proliferation of Native American gaming and what happens to a fictional town when it transforms into the sovereign nation of a long lost tribe. The critically acclaimed novel is also available in paperback and on tape.
In 2007, Shearer plunged into the on-line video universe when the Harry Shearer Channel became a cornerstone of My Damn Channel ( (, an entertainment studio and new media platform specifically created to empower artists to co-produce and distribute episodic video content. Each week a new political or pop culture satire written by and featuring Shearer is unveiled.

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Odd News



If you do decide to play with fireworks in your apartment, don't do it naked.




I wish you all a peaceful Fourth of July.