Monday edition - July 3, 2006

WARTIME FUNNIES

Karl Rove, President Bush's chief political adviser and deputy chief of staff, wears Elvis style sunglasses and sideburns as he walks from Air Force One after Bush returned from a tour of Graceland with Japan's Prime Minister Junichiro Koizumi, Friday, June 30, 2006, at Andrews Air Force Base, Md. (Photo/Charles Dharapak)

 

Al-Qaida leaders sold al-Zarqawi to US
Seattle Post Intelligencer - 7-3-06
... On Monday, an Iraqi legislator said authorities found telephone numbers of senior officials in al-Zarqawi's cell phone after his death. Waiel Abdul-Latif, a member of former Prime Minister Ayad Allawi's party, did not give names of the officials. But he said they included ministry employees and members of parliament.

He called for an investigation, saying Iraqis "cannot have one hand with the government and another with the terrorists."

 

2 in Senate urge bill to curb ruling on tribunals
Chicago Tribune, United States - 7-3-06
WASHINGTON -- Two Republican senators said Sunday that Congress must rein in the Supreme Court ruling that international law applies to the Bush ...

Zarqawi buried in secret in Iraq - Iraqi official
Reuters.uk, UK - Jul 2, 2006
BAGHDAD - Abu Musab al-Zarqawi, the leader of al Qaeda in Iraq killed this month in a US air strike, has been buried in a secret grave in Iraq ...


 

I love the 4th of July -- I'm making my famous Dan Quayle Potatoe Salad!

 


 

"Republican Senator Charles Grassley of Iowa is proposing a tax on pimps and prostitutes. So apparently, it really is hard out there for a pimp.." --Jay Leno

 



 

The-World-Is-A-Safer-Place-Without-Saddam News


 

Geez, Even the Brits Hate Us

 

People in Britain view the United States as a vulgar, crime-ridden society obsessed with money and led by an incompetent president whose Iraq policy is failing, according to a newspaper poll.

 


 

“First of all, it seems a little redundant for him [Rush Limbaugh] to take Viagra. You know, the fact that he takes it he gets taller. I mean, why do you need Viagra? It’s a hard thing when he’s a big pr—ck already.

Where was he staying in the Caribbean? Club Medicated?”
- Comedian Robin Williams

 


Disturbing News

 


 

 


 

Jeb Plays Defense

 

"A day doesn't go by where someone doesn't have a great idea for what my life looks like in 2007 and beyond," the term-limited governor Jeb Bush told reporters last week. "I'm not entertaining any discussion about it."

 


 

Since Bush's first treasury secretary and President Bush himself publicly announced that the U.S. would be tracing bank records to hunt down terrorists, shouldn't they be arrested and thrown into the same jail cell with the editors of The New York Times?-- Zing!

 


Republican Shenanigans

 


 

Frist Foreign Policy

 

Senate Majority Leader Bill Frist urged President Bush on Friday to intensify efforts to put interceptor missiles at a site in Europe to protect against potential attacks from Iran.

 


 

 


 

We should make Congress work for minimum wage.-- Zing!

 


Rock-The-Voter News


 

 

 


 

The doctor says my uncontrollable anal twitching is caused by severe neoconitis. -- Grant Gerver

 



 

 

Food Safety and Lobbyists

 

The Agriculture Department must release the calendars of five senior officials to a consumer group under the federal Freedom of Information Act, a federal appeals court ruled Friday.

Consumer Federation of America wants the appointment calendars to see if department officials met with industry lobbyists who opposed stricter food safety rules. The group filed a FOIA request in 2004 and a lawsuit in 2005.

 


 

 

In this photo reviewed by US military officials, an American flag waves within the razor wire-lined compound of Camp Delta prison, at the Guantanamo Bay U.S. Naval Base, Cuba June 27, 2006. Photo/Brennan Linsley/Pool

 


 

Biz-Tech News


 

Pentagon Declares Itself Clean As A Whistle

 

The Pentagon on Friday released a 2005 military review of prisoner interrogation policies that concluded that no uniformed or civilian leaders directed or encouraged the prisoner abuses committed in Iraq, Afghanistan and Guantanamo Bay, Cuba.

 


 

 


 

Right-Wing Blog Asks Readers to "Hunt Down" Info About NYT Editors' Children

 


Bush-Prison-Torture News


 

“How 'bout the weather in Washington? Oh, my God, the rain, or, as they're calling it, ‘Al Gore's revenge.'" - Jay Leno

 


Go-F*ck-Yourself News

 



 

 

British newspapers are reporting that Prince Charles had an income last year of $25 million dollars. In fact, they say that amount would have been even higher if he actually had a job. -- Jay Leno


 


Odd News


 

Fireworks are over the Potala Palace to mark the start of rail operations in Lhasa, western China's Tibet, Saturday July 1 2006. The US$4.2 billion (euro3.4 billion) Qinghai-Tibet railway, an engineering marvel that crosses mountain passes up to 5,000 meters (16,500 feet) high, is part of government efforts to develop China's poor west and bind restive ethnic areas to the booming east. (Photo/EyePress)

 

Peace and tune in tomorrow for Name That Toon!