Wednesday edition - June 25, 2008




Afghanistan attacks up 40% in east, Pentagon says
Los Angeles Times - 6-25-08
An Afghan policeman stands among shattered buildings and vehicles at the site of a suicide attack in front of the entrance to the main jail in Kandahar on June 14, 2008...


Barack Obama backers demand John McCain fire aide over terror wish
New York Daily News -6-25-08
Barack Obama and John McCain turned up the heat on their debates over energy and terror Tuesday, with some calling on the Republican to fire a top aide who suggested another attack would be a political boon...

What's new: 12-pt lead for Obama in new poll; Nader accuses him of ...
USA Today - 6-25-08
 McCain campaign looks for undecideds, non-partisans to quiz him at townhalls: "Instead of picking crowds of committed supporters to fill his town hall meetings, aides to Republican John McCain say they are hiring specialists to find...


John McCain and Barack Obama bickering. And you know what they’re bickering about now? What to do when they catch Osama bin Laden — that’s right. Obama wants to bring him to trial, John McCain wants to shoot him — both really good ideas. And I said to myself, “Guys, guys, how about somebody finding him first?” - David




The-World-Is-A-Safer-Place-Without Saddam

Meanwhile, South of the Border


Suspected drug hitmen killed six people in Ciudad Juarez in northern Mexico on Tuesday, the latest in a killing spree that has left 41 people dead in the city since the start of the weekend, police said.



Nothing Says Capitalist Pig …
… quite like the bacon briefcase






Disturbing News

Surprise, Surprise


Senior Justice Department officials broke civil service laws by rejecting scores of young applicants who had links to Democrats or liberal organizations, according to a biting report issued yesterday.


News item: President Bush, after touring parts of Illinois flood
communities, declares them a disaster. As a return gesture, parts of Illinois
have declared President Bush a disaster.


Sent in by Pudgeboy, AHNC viewer





George W summoned the country's top scientists for a meeting, during which he announced, "I changed my mind about us going to Mars. I think it'd be a great idea if we sent a manned mission to the Sun." The sounds of stifled groans, clearings of throats, and nervous laughter filled the room. "What," demanded George W, "is the matter with that idea?"

One scientist bravely spoke up, "Well, for one thing, Mr. President, even if we were lucky, any spacecraft would be burned to a cinder if it got within a million miles of the Sun."

George W said, "Yeah? Well, what if we tried landing at night?"


Sent in by Bill, AHNC viewer







Republican-Shenanigans News

Bush Gets Forty Thousand People To Hate Him In One Fell Swoop


British Airways has criticized Heathrow owner BAA for allowing George Bush to fly into the UK's biggest airport, forcing the cancellation of at least 69 flights and disrupting the travel plans of 40,000 passengers.



"Barack Obama, I always thought of him as just a guy. But apparently now he's started a fashion trend. He's started a fashion trend, and Italy is designing clothing based on how Barack Obama dresses. And I said yeah, that will connect him with the angry working-class voters. That's what he wants." --David Letterman





"John McCain. He's inspired a new line of clothing, and I believe if you want some of the John McCain stuff, it's being sold at the Very Old Navy." --David Letterman

Rock-The-Voter News




Latest polls show Barack Obama leading John McCain by 15 points. The last time Democrats had this kind of a lead was John Kerry over George Bush four whole years ago. Oh. – Will Durst



Biz-Tech News


Advertising in the clouds


Bush Memorial You'll Like


A group going by the regal-sounding name of the Presidential Memorial Commission of San Francisco is planning to ask voters here to change the name of a prize-winning water treatment plant on the shoreline to the George W. Bush Sewage Plant.



Bush-Prison-Torture News



"John McCain says that if elected president, he will give a $300 million prize to anyone who can design a new car battery. McCain can get a new type of battery invented because he's the guy that came up with the idea of not cranking the car up at the start." --Craig Ferguson


Go-F**k-Yourself News



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Odd News




This artist rendering released by Dynamic Architecture shows a rotating skyscraper that is to be built in Dubai. An Italian architect said he is poised to start construction on a new skyscraper that will be 'the world's first building in motion,' an 80-story tower with revolving floors that give it an ever-shifting shape.
Photo/Dynamic Architecture