Monday edition - June 23, 2008




Sen. McCain offers $300 million prize for new auto battery
The Associated Press - 6-23-08
The Republican presidential nominee-in-waiting is proposing a $300 million government prize to whomever can develop an automobile battery that far surpasses....


John McCain, drill seeker
Boston Globe, United States - 6-22-08
JOHN MCCAIN has a reputation as a maverick and a conservationist, but neither was in evidence last week when the Republican presidential candidate endorsed

Obama braces for race-based ads
The Associated Press - 6-23-08
Though the election is more than four months away, the campaigns of Democrat Barack Obama and Republican John McCain are shaping their strategies for


"When you're born in the world you're given a ticket to the freak show; when you're born in America you're given a front-row seat." - George Carlin , comedian 1937-2008



The-World-Is-A-Safer-Place-Without Saddam


Meanwhile, Back In Syria


A Syrian newspaper is accusing the U.S. of making false nuclear accusations against Damascus. It's expressing hope that a fact-finding trip by nuclear inspectors to Syria will not turn into a "prolonged affair."



NBC: Brokaw gets "Meet the Press" through election AP



Presidential candidates are asking for a clean campaign. Obama doesn’t want to be called Muslim, McCain doesn’t want to be called old, and Nader is begging everybody to call him. – Pedro Bartes





Disturbing News

McCain Agrees to Forego ‘527s,’ in Favor of ‘666s’

Democratic Senator Barack Obama's decision not to accept public funds for his presidential campaign puts the financing system at risk, said Senator Joe Biden, an Obama supporter.

"No one four years ago could have predicted that an African-American and a woman would have been competing for the presidency of the United States in 2008" - Hillary Clinton






Republican-Shenanigans News


John McCain’s daughter is writing a children’s book based her father’s life. The children’s book is called, “James and the Giant Prostate.” - Conan O'Brien




Let The Lawsuits Begin


The school board of a small central Ohio community voted Friday to fire a teacher accused of preaching his Christian beliefs despite staff complaints and burning the image of a cross on students' arms, according to the Associated Press.


Rock-The-Voter News





Today Ralph Nader attacked Barack Obama for refusing to accept public financing for his campaign and said that Obama was too closely tied to big business. Then the guy sitting next to Nader on the park bench said, “Shut up.” - Conan O'Brien



Biz-Tech News

Still Trying After All These Years


 Lawyers for the White House and Congress are headed to court Monday in a dispute over whether top aides to President Bush must provide evidence in a House investigation.





McCain Vows to Campaign in All 13 Colonies Andy Borowitz


Bush-Prison-Torture News


Comic pioneer George Carlin dies at 71 New York Daily News




Winnebago has reported a 73 percent drop in quarterly sales. Despite the downturn, analysts paint some positive news. This decreases the chance relatives will park in front of your house. - Laughlines


Go-F**k-Yourself News




In a surprise move today, Internet Movie Data Base has up graded from schlock fiction the film “Attack of the Killer Tomatoes.” The film went from “B Movie” to “Cult Classic” to “Documentary” all in one day. – Robt Stupple



Doesn't she look so much better? Actually, all I did was give Cindy McCain a haircut.


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Odd News



The owner of a tiny island in off Scotland declared its independence from the United Kingdom on Saturday, saying he wanted the territory, population one, to be a crown dependency like the Channel Islands. In a declaration on his Web site, Stuart Hill, who owns the 2.5 acre island of Forvik in the Shetland Islands in the North Sea. "I also invite anyone from any country in the world, who supports these aims, namely to become free of liars, thieves and tyrants in government, to become a citizen of Forvik," Hill said.

Photo/John McHugh