"After just 18 months as CIA director, Porter Goss announced that he will be resigning his post to pursue a career as a scapegoat." --Tina Fey

The cost of the first lady's Mississippi visit to commend a young girl's fundraising for Gulf Coast libraries probably cost taxpayers more than the little girl raised. Next time, mail a letter. - Zing!

"Let me tell you what we've learned," Hayden said. "There is no way to get a self-aware, self-synchronizing intelligence system without a kick-ass center because no one plays nice with each other voluntarily."

Israel's Mossad secret service agency killed a Palestinian wanted for airplane hijackings by feeding him poisoned Belgian chocolate over six months in the late 1970s, according to a new book, the author said Saturday.

In the early 1970s, an almost deadly staph infection forced Goss to retire from the CIA.

— The mysterious infection affected his heart and kidneys and was never medically explained.

— Goss is convinced he was poisoned

"Porter Goss the head of the CIA resigned suddenly amid rumors that it has something to do with a floating party that's been going on at the Watergate hotel for years, which involves congressman, lobbyists, defense contractors, and hookers. This is why you don't want your daughter to grow up to be a hooker -- she might fall in with a bad crowd." --Bill Maher

The good news is oil has dropped to under $70 a barrel. And do you know what that will do to the price of gas at the pump? Absolutely nothing.-- Jay Leno

Allowing career oil men to run our country and dictate its foreign policy is like asking an arsonist to become fire chief. -- Zing!

"CIA Director Porter Goss did not resign. This morning they said he resigned, he did not resign. They now say he was fired and apparently didn't know it was coming…which is pretty bad. When you're head of the CIA and you don't know what's coming." -- Jay Leno