Tuesday edition - May 30, 2006


US Moving 1,500 Reserve Troops to Iraq
Houston Chronicle - 5-30-06
US military commanders are moving about 1,500 troops from a reserve force in Kuwait into the volatile Anbar province in western Iraq to help local authorities establish order there.


Military brass slow to learn of deaths
Toronto Star,  Canada - 5-30-06
The country's top military commander says he doesn't know why the Pentagon was kept in the dark about an alleged massacre of Iraqi civilians by US ...

Afghan troops patrol Kabul after anti-US riots
- 5-30-06
Afghan troops patrolled the streets of the capital of Kabul on Tuesday after the worst anti-U.S. riots since the fall of the Taliban in 2001 killed at least eight...


Smirk Alert: Not one member of the Bush/Cheney Clan is serving in the military.



Quit worrying about Iran. We'll just keep pissing them off and putting 'em down. What's the worst that could happen?-- Grant Gerver - Shot Off the Press





The-World-Is-A-Safer-Place-Without-Saddam News



"I'd go, I'm too old and fat, but I'd drive a truck. The American people haven't had to sacrifice anything." -- SOPRANOS star JAMES GANDOLFINI has volunteered to help US President GEORGE W BUSH end the war in Iraq by traveling to the Middle East and fighting himself.



Department of Newspeak - 2006


Federal authorities are actively investigating dozens of American television stations for broadcasting items produced by the Bush administration and major corporations, and passing them off as normal news. Some of the fake news segments talked up success in the war in Iraq, or promoted the companies' products.





Disturbing News


“The Federal Trade Commission said today they did not find any sign, no signs, that the oil industry illegally manipulated gas prices. They also found no signs of steroid use in baseball.” -- Jay Leno


Republican Shenanigans


When All Else Fails, Play the Nazi Card


"Gore believed in global warming almost as much as Hitler believed there was something wrong with the Jews." -- BILL GRAY - He is often called the World's Most Famous Hurricane Expert and global warming non-believer


If I thought Al Gore’s movie was as you like to say, fair and balanced, I’d say, everyone should go see it. But why go see propaganda? You don’t go see Joseph Goebbels’ films to see the truth about Nazi Germany. You don’t go see Al Gore’s films to see the truth about global warming. -- Sterling Burnett is a senior fellow at the National Center for Policy Analysis, an organization that has received over $390,000 from ExxonMobil since 1998.






GOP = Grand Old Pirates


A major figure in the Election Day phone-jamming scandal that embarrassed and nearly bankrupted the New Hampshire GOP is out of prison and back in the political game.

Charles McGee, the former executive director of the state Republican Party, pleaded guilty to conspiracy and served seven months

Rock-The-Voter News


"If people want to get to know me better, they've got to know my parents and the values my parents instilled in me, and the fact that I was raised in West Texas, in the middle of the desert, a long way away from anywhere, hardly. There's a certain set of values you learn in that experience."— George W. Bush, Washington, D.C., May 5, 2006






Good News


I have serious doubts about the accuracy of President's Bush's recent approval ratings. They couldn't possibly be that high. -- Zing!


Biz-Tech News





Supremes Blow Whistle Blowers


The Supreme Court on Tuesday made it harder for government employees to file lawsuits claiming they were retaliated against for going public with allegations of official misconduct.


Bush-Prison-Torture News


President Bush calls for the creation of The Department of Homeland Censorship.

-- Grant Gerver - Shot Off the Press





Christian Charlatan


In August 1999, political organizer Ralph Reed's firm sent out a mailer to Alabama conservative Christians asking them to call then-Rep. Bob Riley (R-Ala.) and tell him to vote against legislation that would have made the U.S. commonwealth of Northern Mariana Islands subject to federal wage and worker safety laws.

Now those seven-year-old words are coming back to haunt Reed, the former executive director of the Christian Coalition and a candidate for the Republican nomination to be Georgia's lieutenant governor.


If we do close GITMO, just where would we be able to torture folks? Wait, I know: somewhere deep inside Mount Rushmore. -- Grant Gerver - Shot Off the Press


Go-F*ck-Yourself News




Did you have a good time today?


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Odd News

This undated photo provided by the International Bird Rescue Research Center, shows an X-ray taken Sunday, May 21, 2006, of an injured duck with a broken wing. The International Bird Rescue Research Center in Cordelia. Calif., plans to raise funds with an unusual duck X-ray, which they say shows the clear image of what appears to be the face, or head, of an extraterrestrial alien in the bird's stomach. Unfortunately, the duck died quickly and quietly of its injuries. (Photo/International Bird Rescue Research Center, Marie Travers)