Thursday edition - May 25, 2006


Lay, Skilling convicted in Enron collapse
BusinessWeek - 5-25-06
MAY. 25 12:34 PM ET Former Enron Corp. chiefs Kenneth Lay and Jeffrey Skilling were convicted Thursday of conspiracy to commit securities ...


Hastert, ABC spar over investigation report
CNN - 5-25-06
WASHINGTON (CNN) -- House Speaker Dennis Hastert is demanding a "full retraction" of an ABC News report that he is being investigated in connection with the ...

Court filing: Cheney may be witness in Libby trial
WASHINGTON (CNN) -- The special counsel prosecuting former White House aide Lewis Libby indicated in court documents filed Wednesday that Libby's former boss ...


Two rotten Republicans convicted, well, it's a start.



We can build a fence on the Mexican border, but we can't repair New Orleans? - Zing!





The-World-Is-A-Safer-Place-Without-Saddam News


 The Great Decider decides there will no longer be separation of powers. -- Grant Gerver



 The ABM Treaty is out-moded, out-dated. It codified a hateful relationship that no longer exists. We need to move beyond the days of the Cold War and free this great freedom-loving people to provide protections for freedom-loving people from all around the world by getting rid of the ABM Treaty once and for all. -- George W. Bush, fundraising at the Sheraton Old Town Hotel, Albuquerque, New Mexico, August 2001


Disturbing News


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Catholics are still continuing to protest over the movie The Da Vinci Code. In fact, some priests are so angry, they are now refusing to take their altar boys to see it. -- Jay Leno








Insults Not Allowed


The Prosecutor’s Office has launched criminal proceedings against the editor-in-chief of a Russian Internet newspaper for calling President Putin “Russia’s phallic symbol”...Investigators confiscated the news website’s computers and sealed the office. The daily’s staff said Rakhmankov’s apartment had been searched too and his PC confiscated. On Monday the website stopped functioning, allegedly due to debts to the Internet provider.



All right, out with it: which 30% of you morons who voted for W approves of the job he's doing? It's all you multi-millionaires, ain't it?!  -- Grant Gerver


Republican Shenanigans





Rock-The-Voter News



The Dixie Chicks




"Don't kid yourself. Global warming is no joke. Here's how serious global warming has gotten to be in the United States. In this country global warming is so bad, we are now actually starting to warm up to Barry Bonds." --David Letterman




Will someone please explain why it's so necessary to spend bunches of taxpayer money to find the bones of Jimmy Hoffa? - Zing!


Biz-Tech News


"The Senate has passed a resolution to make English the official language of the United States. Today President Bush said this is the 'goodest news' he's heard in a long time." --Jay Leno


Bush-Prison-Torture News




"Cheney loves California. See, out here, rich and famous people can shoot other people and get away with it." --Jay Leno


Go-F*ck-Yourself News




Six to eight severe storms forecast by NOAA is in line with what Pat Robertson said God told him. Pity God won't give locations to brother Pat. -- Zing!



Odd News