I'm so glad Michael Steele is leading the Republicans -- right off a cliff!

The-World-Will-Be-A-Safer-Place-Without Saddam

• US military deaths in Iraq war at 4,297 AP

• Roadside bomb kills two Americans outside Kabul Reuters

• US disputes Afghan civilian casualty figures AP

• India gives Pakistan new information on Mumbai attack Reuters

• U.S. Army paid bonuses to KBR despite questions AP

• Iraqis don't jog or spin, but fitness clubs are in AP

• Swine flu outbreak reveals military plans, gaps AP

• Obama prods Netanyahu, Iran in Mideast foray AP

• Unsolicited Bibles burned in Afghanistan CNN

 The former Vice President Dick Cheney is in town, ladies and gentlemen, in New York City. He’s here to see all of his favorite shows: “Phantom”, “Wicked”, “Stomp.”- David Letterman

Don't Ask!

The Pentagon says it has no plans to repeal the don't ask-don't tell policy for gay troops.

Pentagon spokesman Geoff Morrell said Tuesday that the military's top leaders have only had initial discussions with the White House about whether gay troops should be open about their sexuality. ...The 1993 law was enacted as a compromise between openly gay people serving in the armed forces and those opposed to gays in uniform.

Disturbing News

• 98 killed in Indonesia plane crash CNN

• Husband, dad arrested in death of wife, sons CNN

• Ireland braces for report on Catholic child abuse AP

• Deadly pneumonia caused by super-bugs on rise: study Reuters

AARP Scam

AARP's former events director has pleaded guilty in a scam involving a sham company he created to get $250,000 in contracts from the advocacy group.

Bruce Sanders of Washington admitted he entered AARP into three consulting and production contracts with the fake company, naming as president of the company a man with whom Sanders was romantically involved.
 

"On Saturday, President Obama went to Malia and Sasha's soccer games. He rode to the games on Minivan One." --Jimmy Fallon
 

Republican-Shenanigans News

• RNC Chairman Urges Stronger Attacks on Obama Washington Post

• Steele insists GOP comeback has started AP

• Schwarzenegger's 3rd budget reform attempt flops AP

• Borger: Obama ignores the 'rules,' stirs the pot CNN

It's Legal To Blow $150K On Clothes!

The Federal Election Commission has decided that $150,000 or more in clothing purchased by the Republican party for Sarah Palin and her family around the time of her vice presidential nomination did not violate campaign finance regulations.

Rock-The-Voter News

• Obama gives thumping endorsement to Pelosi MiamiHerald.com

• AP sources: White House mulls regulatory panel AP

"Well, another gaffe by Vice President Joe Biden. God bless Joe Biden. He's been our savior here. Newsweek is reporting that at the Gridiron Dinner, Joe Biden started talking and accidentally revealed Dick Cheney's secret hiding place. See, there's more proof you don't need waterboarding to get secret information. Just give Joe Biden a couple of drinks." --Jay Leno
 

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Biz-Tech News

• Oil hovers above $60 as investors eye inventories AP

• Bank of America raises $13.47 billion in share sale Reuters

• HP's profit drops, more layoffs looming AP

• Activists seek Justice Dept. probe of insurers AP

• Microsoft may unveil new search engine next week: report Reuters

Creative Bonus Tactic

Banks are using a little-known tactic to help pay bonuses, deferred pay and pensions they owe executives: They're holding life-insurance policies on hundreds of thousands of their workers, with themselves as the beneficiaries

Oh, I tell you, the economy is bad. It’s in bad shape. Oh, it’s bad. I saw Lou Dobbs picking up day laborers at Home Depot today.- Jay Leno

Bush-Prison-Torture News

• Stan McChrystal, Dick Cheney, and the Nuances of "Torture" Esquire

• Senate Dems to cut $80 million for closing Guantanamo Washington Post

Los Angeles will start a water rationing in June, which means Dick Cheney will only be allowed to waterboard guys two days a week now.- Jay Leno

 

Go-F**k-Yourself News

• Barack Obama, Dick Cheney plan dueling speeches Politico

• LANNY DAVIS: It's Time to Indict Cheney! FOXNews

• Crossed Wires About VP Hide-Out Washington Post

Navy Carrier Squadron "Pump It"

Must see video

Actually, a new study from the University of Mississippi shows that marijuana potency is at its highest level in over 30 years. Marijuana is now stronger than it has ever been. See, this is why Domino’s had to start putting cheese in the crust. This is why they had to come out with the Double Stuf Oreos. The snacks were not keeping up with the marijuana.- Jay Leno

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