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Wednesday
edition - April 30, 2008

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Bush says Congress is behind US woes
Baltimore Sun, United States -
4-30-08
AP WASHINGTON - President Bush, hoping to inoculate his party and his
presidential legacy from election-year anger over the economy, heaped
criticism on the... |
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More oil drilling a must, Bush says
Houston Chronicle -
4-30-08
WASHINGTON - With the price
at the pump climbing to another record Tuesday, President Bush reiterated
his call for Congress to open more areas for drilling while dismissing
suggestions he stop adding crude to the nation's emergency |
GOP Plans $500000 Hit On Obama, Dems
CBS News, NY - 4-30-08
Barack Obama is set to play hardball as he responds to GOP ads questioning
his patriotism and rival candidate Hillary Clinton's invitations to
another... |
"The Bush
administration wants our nation's 80 million recreational boaters to help fight
terrorism by watching out for small boats that could deliver a nuclear bomb.
Well, that should work out well, huh? You got a bunch of beer-drinking fishermen
in bass boats with rifles. What could go wrong there?" --Jay Leno

The-World-Is-A-Safer-Place-Without-Saddam News
Meanwhile, Back In Iran
The U.S. Navy has
temporarily added a second aircraft carrier in the Gulf as a "reminder" to Iran,
but this was not an escalation of American forces in the region, U.S. Defense
Secretary Robert Gates said on Tuesday.
Speaking to reporters during a trip to Mexico,
Gates
flatly denied a suggestion that the presence of two U.S. carriers in the Gulf
could be a precursor to military action against Tehran.
"Have you
noticed, since oil prices went up, Dick Cheney hasn't had one heart attack?"
--Jay Leno
Disturbing News
GOP Sharpening Their Tool
``For someone who's been in
office as little as Barack Obama, the guy has a record that defines the word
liberal,''
said Chris LaCivita, a Republican media adviser to the Swift Boat veterans
who assailed Kerry's Vietnam War record during the Massachusetts senator's 2004
presidential bid.

"Today,
John McCain campaigned across the state of Florida. He's in Florida. Yeah,
McCain likes campaigning in Florida because everyone there calls him 'the Kid.'
... His charming youthfulness amuses them." --Conan O'Brien
Email:
Subject: Nice guys finish last in
politics
Lisa,
This is why we keep losing these elections. The people we nominate are just too
decent to fight back against the kind of crap that the Right (Wrong) Wing starts
throwing at them. Had John Kerry (a fine and honorable man) been a little less
civil, in response to the Swift Boat issue, perhaps using the occasion to point
out loudly and repeatedly that W spent the entire Viet Nam war period shooting
touch and goes in Houston, when he bothered to show up at all, we would probably
have been Bush-free for the last 3 years.
I suspect that if Mr. Gore had raised more of a fuss about the attacks on him,
or had he the tenacity to fight the judicial coronation of "King George the
one-half," we would be celebrating 7 years of peace and prosperity. Moreover,
had he the confidence in himself to agree to Florida's recounting the whole
state in 2000 rather than just the metropolitan Miami area (it is one of the
supreme ironies that had either candidate agreed to the recount demanded by his
opponent, he would have been handed a legitimate victory, or at least one he
could call legitimate) we would not be in this mess.
Essentially, democrats need to drop the "we're above all that" attitude, if they
are ever to become ascendant in the executive branch. While we, the electorate,
decry the negative campaigning, we do look for someone with the scrap to fight
back, but with intelligence. We look for someone who will strike back at those
who attack us, such as FDR after Pearl Harbor, not someone who will lash out at
the first available target (such as Iraq, or in the case of WWII, if FDR's
response to Pearl Harbor had been to attack Venezuela..."lots of oil, call 'em
Nazis, who knows, might work?")
Thanks,
John
Thanks
for the great e-mail, John.
I agree,
we need a Democrat who isn't afraid to fight back, immediately and with surgical
precision.
Last
month, Obama called Wright his "crazy uncle" when presented with the crazy
quotes by Wright. ( see cartoon below by Daryl Cagle on March 17, 2008 )
But yesterday, almost a month and a half later, he said he was outraged by
Wright. It sure takes Obama a long time to be outraged. Poor Obama, the GOP is
going to eat him alive.

Republican-Shenanigans News
"And
Barack Obama also on a tour, of places he'd like to forget, like his church.
It's never your enemies that kill you. It's always your friends, isn't it?"
--Jay Leno

Rock-The-Voter News
"And boy,
it was hot this weekend...In fact, it was so hot, Hillary Clinton challenged
Barack Obama to another debate, just so she could get the cold shoulder."
--Jay Leno

Biz-Tech News
Arrest Bush, Already!
--"Why are we talking about
this in the White House?" John Ashcroft nervously asked his fellow members of
the National Security Council's Principals Committee. (The Principals were Vice
President Dick Cheney, National Security Adviser Condoleezza Rice, Defense
Secretary Donald Rumsfeld and Secretary of State Colin Powell, CIA Director
George Tenet and Attorney General Ashcroft.)
"History will not judge this kindly," Ashcroft predicted.
"This" is torture. Against innocent people. Conducted by CIA agents and American
soldiers and marines. Sanctioned by legal opinions issued by Ashcroft's Justice
Department.
Directly ordered by George W. Bush.

"Kind of a
strange thing happened this weekend at a big event in Washington, DC. President
Bush, I guess he got excited, so he picked up a baton and he started conducting
the U.S. Marine Band. Yeah, unfortunately, the president got upset because the
band didn't know the song, 'The Wheels on the Bus.' They go 'round and 'round,
apparently." --Conan O'Brien
Bush-Prison-Torture News
Texas Injustice
A man walked out of a Dallas
court on Tuesday after DNA testing overturned his conviction over 27 years ago
for the murder and rape of his girlfriend, local media reported.
James Woodward, 55,
spent
more time in prison than any other wrongfully convicted inmate in U.S. history
who was subsequently freed by DNA testing, local media reported.

On April 30,
1975, the South Vietnamese capital
of Saigon fell to Communist forces.
We're
gettin' a rebate check every month, right? - Grant Gerver,
www.seriouskidding.com

Go-F**k-Yourself News
Haven't
seen Cheney in a while. He's probably performing animal experiments in his
torture lab. - Grant Gerver,
www.seriouskidding.com

Thank you Jonathan, Binks, Rick Ringo and Richard for your generous donations
yesterday! Big hug!
Please support All Hat No Cattle
Offline
Donation
Lisa Casey
PO Box 88
Ashford. AL
36312
Click here to e-mail a
comment
Odd News

This handout
from Amsterdam's Jewish Historical Museum, from the Superheroes and Schlemiels
exhibition, shows 'How Superman would end the war' by Jerry Siegel and Joe
Shuster, Look Magazine, February 27, 1940.
Photo/DC Comics/Amsterdam Jewish Historical Museum
Peace.
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"Lisa, Congrats on your sweep! As George Bush might
have said, 'Lucky me, I hit the trifecta.' Seriously, I'm glad to be able to
salute you and all the great laughs you provide." - Daniel Kurtzman, About.com
Guide to Political Humor.



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