TGIF/Weekend Edition - April 14-16, 2006

US Mail: Lisa Casey - PO Box 88 - Ashford, AL 36312



Newly crowned Miss Iraq fears for her life
Seattle Post Intelligencer - Apr 12, 2006
Iraq's newly crowned beauty queen has gone into hiding, fearing she will be targeted by Islamic militants who reportedly threatened to kill other women who participated in a Baghdad pageant last week.


Judge in CIA Leak Case Threatens Gag Order
Washington Post, United States - 4-14-06
The federal judge presiding over the pending trial of I. Lewis "Scooter" Libby threatened yesterday to impose a gag order barring statements or disclosures to ...

Bush, Reid Trade Insults on Immigration
ABC News - 4-14-06
President Bush accused Senate Democratic leader Harry Reid on Thursday of "single-handedly thwarting"..."President Bush has as much credibility on immigration as he does on Iraq and national security," shot back the Nevada Democrat


The moon is made of green cheese, the check is in the mail, and George Bush is a good Christian man.



The White House celebrated Passover -- that's when President Bush will take secret, classified documents and pass them over to a reporter. -- Jay Leno






The-World-Is-A-Safer-Place-Without-Saddam News


First Lady Fundraiser


The first lady is back on the hustings with gusto, deploying her sky-high popularity, practiced smile and firm defense of President Bush ‘s agenda for Republicans nationwide. GOP strategists say sending Mrs. Bush out to help candidates running in the midterm elections is a no-brainer.

Squeezed between foreign trips focused on expanding opportunities for women and more traditional first lady duties, Mrs. Bush has notched 10 political appearances so far —
all fundraisers.




"President Bush announced his new fitness plan to get people walking again. It's called, 'Gasoline at $3 a gallon.' ... Given how expensive gas is, today, I saw a van with 50 legal Americans inside it." --Jay Leno


Disturbing News



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TRUE BLUE Review - "TRUE BLUE, like its creator, defies characterization or pigeonholing. What can be said is that if you play TRUE BLUE on a Sunday morning ten years from now it will sound just as fresh, and new, and contemporary, as it will the first time you play it." -- Joe Hartlaub

Click here to visit Dan Tyler's Website

Click here




"The Pentagon admitted it's been spying on gay groups. The Pentagon also admitted that since it's started spying on gay groups, it's been having some weird feelings." --Conan O'Brien


Republican Shenanigans





Ann Coulter


The essence of the tactic of McCarthyism is to de-legitimize one’s opponent so as to avoid addressing the substance of his argument. When say, Ann Coulter, accuses liberals of being “perverts,” “liars,” “felons,” “traitors,” “terrorists” and the like, the obvious goal is to make it impossible for liberals to be heard respectfully in the national political discourse.



Jack Bauer, Meet George Bush - Mark Fiore animation



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Rock-The-Voter News



The Four Ghosts of the White House

One night, George W. Bush is tossing restlessly in his White House bed.
He awakens to see George Washington standing by him Bush asks him,
"George, what's the best thing I can do to help the country?"
"Set an honest and honorable example, just as I did," Washington
advises, and then fades away
The next night, Bush is astir again, and sees the ghost of Thomas
Jefferson moving through the darkened bedroom. Bush calls out, "Tom,
please! What is the best thing I can do to help the country?"
"Respect the Constitution, as I did," Jefferson advises, and dims from

The third night sleep still does not come for Bush. He awakens to see
the ghost of FDR hovering over his bed. Bush whispers, "Franklin, What
is the best thing I can do to help the country?"
"Help the less fortunate, just as I did," FDR replies and fades into the

Bush isn't sleeping well the fourth night when he sees another figure
moving in the shadows. It is the ghost of Abraham Lincoln. Bush pleads,
"Abe, what is the best thing I can do right now to help the country?"
Lincoln replies, "Go see a play."




Semper Fi


The young Marine had just shot a suspected insurgent and was walking back across the villa's rooftop when he keeled over from a terrific thud to the back of his head.


A sniper had fired a single, well-aimed bullet that tore through the top of Lance Cpl. Richard Caseltine's helmet, traced a path along the edge of his skull and buried burning bullet fragments in the back of his neck.

Less than a minute later, the 20-year-old from Aurora, Ind., was up on his feet —
crouching, shaking and miraculously, still alive.






The Easter Bunny is real. There is no civil war in Iraq.  - Grant Gerver



Rep. Kennedy Hit in the Mouth by Hammer -- No, Not  by "The Hammer"


U.S. Rep. Patrick Kennedy was hit in the face with a hammer when an entrepreneur, demonstrating shock absorption, accidentally sent the hammer's head flying at Kennedy's mouth.

Kennedy received six stitches in his bottom lip after the incident Wednesday
during an economic development meeting

Good News



"He was booed. Cheney said he was very surprised. He thought he'd be greeted as a liberator with flowers and candy." --David Letterman, on Cheney throwing out the first pitch at the Washington Nationals home opener


Biz-Tech News



"The bad news is Iran is capable of making a nuclear bomb. The good news is they have to drop it from a camel." --David Letterman




Bush-Prison-Torture News



Subject: Dick


Hi Lisa,

Love your site as always.

How come we never see what Dick Cheney does for a living?

Has he ever presided over the senate, or does he just cuss at the senators?

Sorry, I'm not being funny tonight.



Give Dick a break, it's hard, hard work doling out what remains in our U.S. Treasury.




"I don't know why President Bush can't leak us information that we can actually use, like tell us when Dick Cheney is going hunting again." --Jay Leno




Go-F*ck-Yourself News


Top Ten Little Known Facts About Dick Cheney - David Letterman

10. Has iPod pacemaker that keeps his heart beating to Aerosmith

9. Enjoys reading his grandson excerpts from shady defense contracts

8. First vice president since Mondale to take a leak in the Rose Garden

7. Not sure if this is significant but he was the last to see Don Knotts alive

6. Has a daily 5 o'clock meeting with advisors Jim Beam and Jack Daniel's

5. In 1994, underwent a failed sneer-reduction procedure

4. The second the cameras are off, so are his pants

3. His undisclosed location is a Hooters in San Antonio

2. Loves the elderly -- well, shooting at them

1. His approval rating is now lower than his number of heart attacks



George W. Bush's Next Job




"I think the proudest thing I have done on the bench is not allow myself to be chased off that case. ... For Pete's sake, if you can't trust your Supreme Court justice more than that, get a life." --Supreme Court Justice Antonin Scalia, on his 2004 decision not to recuse himself from a case involving Vice President Cheney, with whom he had gone duck hunting months earlier





Odd News




A sculpture by Camille Allen.




Have a peaceful holiday weekend.