I wonder if Todd of the Tundra will do snow machine tricks for the reality show? Maybe David Letterman can have Todd on his show to do stupid human tricks.

President Obama yesterday had his annual physical. Annual checkup. Apparently everything is all right. Earlier today, former Vice President Dick Cheney went in for his annual autopsy.-  –David Letterman

The-World-Will-Be-A-Safer-Place-Without Saddam

• Attacks kill 12 as Iraqi troops and police vote

• 5 Pakistani road workers shot dead in Afghanistan

• Iraqi troops, police vote ahead of election

• Iran casts its shadow over high-stakes Iraq vote

• Israel, Palestinians set for indirect talks Reuters

• 4 convicted over plot against US sites in Germany

• China's military spending slows, on paper Christian Science Monitor

• Singapore warns of terror threat in Malacca Strait

"Talking about presidents who smoked. You remember George W. Bush? Remember him? He's saying while he was president he would enjoy the occasional cigar. On a rare occasion, he would have a cigar because he said it helped him think. I want to tell you, occasions don't get more rare than that, ladies and gentlemen." –David Letterman
 

Ship Over American Made Mobile Homes And Call It A Day

Another State Department construction project has gone awry, and once again the builders of the troubled U.S. Embassy compound in Baghdad are involved. This time, the problem is in Saudi Arabia .

According to officials and documents obtained by McClatchy , work has ground to a halt on the new, $122 million U.S. consulate in Jeddah , the Red Sea port, amid allegations of unsafe practices, poor labor conditions and feuding between the two companies responsible for the project.
 

Disturbing News

• India: 63 dead, dozens injured in temple stampede

• Strong earthquake hits Taiwan; 12 people injured

• Huge wave kills 2 on cruise ship in Mediterranean

• Video of kidnap victim Jaycee Dugard to air on ABC

 I love the biathlon. That’s the sport that involves skiing and shooting the rifle. Or as Sarah Palin and her husband, Todd, call it, “date night.”- Jay leno

No More Mercenaries!

 A senior Senate Democrat says the Pentagon should consider scrapping a potential $1 billion deal with the company formerly known as Blackwater because of "serious questions" about the contractor's conduct.

Republican-Shenanigans News

• Savvy conservatism, country charm led Perry to win Dallas Morning News

• Republican Party's 2010 fundraising strategy: fear  Salon

• Palin At Oscar Gift Suite: Sarah Palin And Entourage 'Like Locusts' Huffington Post (blog)

Mitt Romney is a good-looking Republican from Massachusetts. You know, he’s like that new senator from Massachusetts. He’s like Scott Brown, but with pants.-  David Letterman

 

Rock-The-Voter News

• Obama reasserts Volcker rule, Senate bill seen

• Levin is acting chair of Ways and Means panel

• Senate rejects $250 checks for elderly

• House leaders push toward health vote by Easter

• Justices may extend gun owner rights nationwide

No Hanging Chads Here

 The largest voting machine company in the country bought its biggest competitor six months ago without advance fanfare. Now the Justice Department is investigating whether to unwind the merger that put a privately held Nebraska company in control of the voting machines in nearly 70 percent of the nation's precincts.

"Did you guys watch the season finale of 'The Bachelor' last night? Well, fans are not happy that Jake proposed to Vienna instead of Tenley. Yeah, people are very angry that he picked a lady that nobody really likes. And then John McCain was like, 'Hey, it happens.'" –Jimmy Fallon
 

Ads by Google

Biz-Tech News

• Oil falls to near $80 after 2-day jump

• Toyota Prius tops Japan sales despite recall woes AP

• Toyota sued over deaths in key California crash

• Madoff ruling may save UBS, HSBC from mass claims

• AB InBev sees flat beer sales

"But Obama's physical turned out great. The doctor said a couple of things. He said: 'Cut out the cigarettes. Also, try to stay out of Toyotas.'" –David Letterman
 

Should Ulysses S. Grant, the legendary Union general and 18th president of the United States, be bumped from his 96-year stint on the $50 bill?

Yes, according to one North Carolina Republican.

Rep. Patrick McHenry announced that he will introduce a measure that would replace Grant's face with Ronald Reagan's, just in time for the 40th president's 100th birthday next February.
 

Bush-Prison-Torture News

• Former Gitmo detainee said running Afghan battles AP

"More problems with the auto industry. General Motors announced a recall of 1.3 million cars because of a steering problem. Apparently, the cars are unable to steer out of the path of oncoming Toyotas." –Jay Leno
 

Go-F**k-Yourself News

• Liz Cheney to address SRLC Politico

"And over the weekend, President Bush said that he is writing a book about how he made decisions while he was president. We have an advanced copy of it here. It's called 'What Would Dick Cheney Do?'" –Jay Leno
 

www.internetweekly.org

2010 Fundraiser

Please kick in a few bucks to keep All Hat No Cattle Online

Thank you Clay and Richard.

Offline Donation - Lisa Casey - PO Box 88 - Ashford, AL 36312

 Email me lisa@allhatnocattle.net