Thursday edition - March 30, 2006
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Bush Blames Saddam for Iraq Instability
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Bush heads to Mexico,
doesn't pack Speedo |
Cops: Teen Threatened School, Not Bush |
Bush in a Speedo? Even worse, Mama Bush in a bikini.
"June 1st is the start of the hurricane season. President Bush is already stockpiling excuses." --David Letterman
"Andrew Card has spent the last five years managing the Bush White House as the ratings have steadily declined. Given that experience, today he was hired by NBC." --Jay Leno
The-World-Is-A-Safer-Place-Without-Saddam News
Gunmen kill Iraq police commando, lawyer USA Today
As US deaths in Iraq decline, civilian violence is on upswing Seattle Times
Afghan fighting kills American, Canadian, 32 insurgents Boston Globe
Another Baghdad business attacked Pioneer Press, MN
Family, colleagues elated at release of reporter Jill Carroll Boston Herald
Afghan convert 'arrives in Italy' Journal of Turkish Weekly, Turkey
Documents Describe US Auditors' Battles With Halliburton Los Angeles Times
"Vice President Dick Cheney said yesterday Democrats are not competent to fight the war in Iraq -- this coming from a guy who shot a bird and hit a lawyer." --Jay Leno
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Disturbing News
Winds build along Australia's west coast WLBT-TV, MS
"He just gave a promotion to the guy who was in charge of our nine trillion dollar debt. You know what? I really think if you walked into a cabinet meeting and started hurling your feces at the wall, Bush would name a state after you."
--Jon Stewart, on Bush naming Joshua Bolten his new chief of staff
It's OK When Republicans Do It
Tom DeLay is fighting to regain his concealed handgun permit after it was suspended
because of his indictment on felony charges.
Republican Shenanigans
Rice's New Hussein-al Qaeda Spin Has the Same Old Flaws Media Channel, NY
SC Lt. Gov. Caught Speeding, No Tickets Washington Post
When our politicians and religious leaders crawl into bed with each other, it produces the faith-based citizen.-- Zing!
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Christian Star Wars
There are those who would say Tom DeLay lost his job
as House majority leader because he was indicted by a Texas grand jury for money
laundering and conspiracy, or because of his extensive ties to lawbreaking
lobbyist Jack Abramoff. But they would be wrong.
In fact, the Texas Republican fell from power
because he is a Christian.
"Well, you know, that's the problem in America, we're always having elections." --Sen. John Cornyn (R-TX), asked about election year divisions in the GOP
Rock-The-Voter News
Subpoenas go to vote machine vendors St. Petersburg Times, FL
Space Control to Major Tom
Five days after NASA administrator Michael Griffin urged a Houston audience to keep U.S. Rep. Tom DeLay in office,
a spokesman denied Wednesday that Griffin had made a formal campaign endorsement.
Good News
"Andy Card resigned. Finally a Republican leaving Washington not in handcuffs." --Jay Leno
Biz-Tech News
Oil holds above $66, world powers discuss Iran Brocktown News
Feds' gas squeeze on SUVs New York Daily News
Dollar Falls on Speculation US Yield Advantage Will Narrow Bloomberg
Tattoos OK, Gays Still Not
The U.S. Army, which missed its recruiting goal last year, has relaxed its policy banning certain types of tattoos in a bid to attract new soldiers who otherwise would have been barred from serving.
Your Responses - Exile Bush to ___________________
IRAQ--The Iraqis would love to
get their hands on him and they could use the billions to rebuild their
country.
(Additional revenue source: put Bush in the same cell as Saddam and sell
tickets to watch the ensuing cage match.) - Ron B
The only place I can think of that would take this idiot would be Dumbfuckistan. - Bob H
I think North Korea would be just right for POOTUS. - Tom M
My preference is Antarctica or the North Pole, preferably in an igloo without any heat. Maybe he can do less harm that way. - Eileen
Cayman islands - www.yborcitystogieonline.com
Iraq Let Freedom reign - Duggly
Venezuela - james
Mongolia - bob
Iraq--without a doubt. See how he likes it--especially with "all the progress and good things" going on there!
Anchor a moth-balled aircraft carrier off the coast of Antarctica, allow him to call it a country (it wont matter that it actually isn't) and let him strut around in a flight suit proclaiming "Mission Accomplished!" - wylie
Hands down: India - Ned
That's easy, Saudi Arabia
Antarctica - Larry
ASSHOLISTAN - Best Regards, Bill N
Toodrunkistan
hey, Lisa,
how about Lower Slobovia? ;-) if my memory serves me
right, that's a Li'l Abner thing. how appropriate. ;-)
Kathy, Murfreesboro
Any country with lots of oil, a monarchy, and ties to Al Qaeda? - Roger
Saudi Arabia
They already own the entire Bush Clan and friends. -- Charles L. G
This is a no brainer. IRAQ - VT
Iraq, of course! He broke it, he
bought it! - Peter T
Thank you for your fabulous exile locations! BTW, Iraq won the unofficial poll.
Bush-Prison-Torture News
High court shows concern over Bush war- crimes trials The Argus, CA
"I feel very comfortable up here. The lighting could be better, but I can still see the whites of your eyes." --Vice President Dick Cheney, at the annual Radio & Television Correspondents' Association dinner
Go-F*ck-Yourself News
Cheney Hits His Mark At Correspondents' Salute to Congress Washington Post
Bush says he looked into Putin's eyes and saw his soul. Fortunately, Putin was gracious enough not to mention he looked into Bush's ear and saw daylight on the other side.
-- Will Durst
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Odd News
The tallest woman in Asia, Chinese Yao Defen (R), and her friend knit at her home in Shu Cha in eastern China's Anhui province March 15, 2006. Yao, is 34 years old and 2.36 metres tall. Photo/Nir Elias
Peace.
