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All Hat No Cattle laughs at people pretending to be something they're not. Toons and funny one liners to lessen the hard right blows.

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Wednesday edition - March 25, 2009



Jindal defends those who want Obama to fail
CNN International - ‎3-25-09
Bobby Jindal told members of his political party Tuesday night. Gov. Bobby Jindal is offering a spirited defense of Republicans who say they want President ...


Oil terminal a concern as Alaska volcano rumbles
The Associated Press - ‎3-25-09
ANCHORAGE, Alaska (AP) — An Alaska volcano continued to rumble Tuesday amid new concerns that eruptions and mud flows will damage a nearby oil terminal

After Jindal lets off steam, Alaska volcano ups the ante
The Times-Picayune - -3-25-09
Bobby Jindal's derisive comments about volcano monitoring in his nationally televised speech to the country last month. From a Democratic senator in Alaska


"This week eight tourists became the first Westerners to vacation in Iraq on an officially sanctioned tour. They're taking spring break in Iraq, which is kind of like spring break in Florida. Half get bombed. The other half get stoned." --Jay Leno



The-World-Will-Be-A-Safer-Place-Without Saddam

The Other Endless War


Hundreds of federal agents, along with high-tech surveillance gear and drug-sniffing dogs, are headed to the Southwest to help Mexico fight drug cartels and keep violence from spilling across the U.S.-Mexico border, Obama administration officials said Tuesday.



"In a move that will cost 300 Americans their jobs, the Federal government announced it will no longer buy American-made condoms made in Alabama. We're now going to buy cheaper condoms made in China. Does that make any sense? If Chinese condoms are so good, why are there over one billion Chinese people?" --Jay Leno


Disturbing News

Health Insurance Industry Update


The health insurance industry offered Tuesday for the first time to curb its controversial practice of charging higher premiums to people with a history of medical problems.



"Former President George W. Bush is now writing a book about the 12 toughest decisions that he had to make as president. He said each decision had three options -- rock, paper and scissors." --Jay Leno





Republican-Shenanigans News

AIG Bonuses Are A Drop In The Bucket


The U.S. Treasury Department preserved a payday for five banks that was worth almost 200 times the bonuses handed out at American International Group Inc. through a government rescue.

As part of a bid to prevent the insurer’s failure, the U.S. settled derivatives and loan contracts worth $32.7 billion with Goldman Sachs Group Inc., Merrill Lynch & Co., Societe Generale, Deutsche Bank AG and UBS AG.



Rock-The-Voter News


"The Obama Administration today unveiled their plan to deal with the so-called toxic assets. Those are those mortgage-backed securities all the financial institutions are holding. Apparently, the plan is to flood the banks with money, make them as liquid as possible, and then sort of soak up all these bad loans and take them away. See, they got this idea from watching those 'ShamWow' commercials." --Jay Leno




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Biz-Tech News


If we use the Bush barometer on how Barack Obama is doing, the answer is, well, he's doing perfectly. He's kept us safe for 60 days. – Keith Olbermann


Bush-Prison-Torture News


If we really want to find out what made Bernie Madoff did with all that money, we must turn him over to Dick Cheney. After all, one outrageous pyramid scheme deserves another. [slide of nude Abu Ghraib prisoner pyramid] - Bill Maher



Talk To The Hair



Former Gov. Rod Blagojevich filled in as a radio talk show host Wednesday, using the mike to complain he was "hijacked" from office and blasting the new governor's plans for an income tax increase.


Go-F**k-Yourself News







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Odd News


To Help You Deflate Photo




British Columbia Environment Minister Barry Penner (C) discusses the new restrictions controlling the owning and breeding of exotic animals during a news conference as Pisco the boa constrictor looks on at the aquarium in Vancouver, British Columbia March 17, 2009. The provincial government has introduced new regulations on several species, including types of mammals, amphibians and reptiles that are a risk to public safety.
Photo/Andy Clark







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"Lisa, Congrats on your sweep! As George Bush might have said, 'Lucky me, I hit the trifecta.' Seriously, I'm glad to be able to salute you and all the great laughs you provide." - Daniel Kurtzman, Guide to Political Humor.







Daily Frontpage   Archives     You might be a right wing Republican if..What Liberal Media?   Republican Presidential Quotations   Bush-Cheney Political Contributions   Cream of the Crop Links  T-Shirts, Mugs and More    Please donate so I can put food on my family  Subscribe to AHNC About AHNC   Advertise on All Hat No Cattle  Contact me  Copyright Notice

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