And earlier today, the President held a town meeting, and Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger was there. And I thought it was great to see the President reaching out to California’s non-English-speaking community.- Jay Leno
The-World-Will-Be-A-Safer-Place-Without George W. Bush
Subject: Weekend commentary
Hi Lisa ... Too bad Obama didn't say, "I bowl as well as Bush eats pretzels." No one would have been offended by that! Check out this Dallas Magazine
http://www.dmagazine.com/2009/03/23/Welcome_Home_No_43.aspx
Ode
To The Easily Offended AIG, Citing Security Concerns, to Merge With Blackwater
Disturbing News
Joe The Plumber Is Horny
Joe the Plumber got hot and bothered in Washington
last night.
Palin Against Building Codes "For instance, in order to accept what look like attractive energy funds, our local communities would be required to adopt uniform building codes," she said. "Government would then be required to police those codes. These types of funds are not sensible for Alaska."
Republican-Shenanigans News
The Washington Post reporting that senior executives at A.I.G. whose decisions caused the companies to collapse are long gone and that these bonuses that everybody’s complaining about are actually being paid to people who are trying to fix the problem. O.K., here’s my thing. Fix the problem, then you get the bonus.- Jay Leno
Secret Service Loses Van, Jenna Bush OK
Baltimore transportation
officials towed a Secret Service van connected with former first daughter Jenna
Bush's security detail yesterday, according to city and federal
officials...Children of former presidents receive protection until age 16,
according to the Secret Service's Web site.
It was not immediately clear why Bush, 27, is still entitled to that security.
Rock-The-Voter News
This handout
from Russian advertising agency Voskhod shows a smiling, cartoonish black man
flashing the victory sign in front of the US capital building, along with the
Russian slogan: "Everyone's talking about it: dark inside white!" Obama ice
cream, anyone? Chocolate-vanilla ice cream is one of several Russian products
being marketed using Obama even as critics call the ads racist.
"I think it would be cool to be president. You know what I would do if I was president? I would watch the movie 'Air Force One' on Air Force One." --Jay Leno
Subject: Robotic Fish
Am I the
only one who sees the scary potential use of these fish as spy equipment and
covert explosives delivery robots? I seriously doubt the british government
really cares about preventing pollution with this technology although they may
cloak the program in such aims, much as the CIA infitrates aid groups and peace
corps missions with corporate spies. The use of robotic insects begs the same
question for terrestrial operations and assasinations. One can even imagine one
of these benevolan Fishybots delivering a plague of assasination flies loaded
with a hi-tech poison destined for labor leaders, pesky webmasters and pinkos!
Assassination FishBots...OMG, I
snorkel!
Graphic sent in by Bob Boldt Ads by Google
Biz-Tech News
"Terror struck Orange County last night as someone toilet papered the new home of Octomom Nadya Suleman. I will say this, it's nice to see that Americans can finally afford to waste toilet paper again, maybe the economy is turning around." - Jimmy Kimmel
Bush-Prison-Torture News
Today In History
On March 23, 1775, Patrick Henry addressed the Virginia Provincial Convention; according to biographer William Wirt, it was during this speech that Henry declared, "Give me liberty, or give me death!"
In 1919, Benito Mussolini founded his Fascist political movement in Milan.
In 1933, the German Reichstag adopted the Enabling Act, which effectively granted Adolf Hitler dictatorial powers.
In 1956, Pakistan became an Islamic republic.
Five years ago: A federal commission said Clinton and Bush administration officials had engaged in lengthy, ultimately fruitless diplomatic efforts instead of military action to try to get Osama bin Laden before the Sept. 11 attacks; top Bush officials countered that the terror attacks would have occurred even if the United States had killed the al-Qaida leader.
Lest we forget …
the moronic behavior of the past President who so seriously harmed our nation, All Hat No Cattle now offers a different notable quotation from George W. Bush each week. “We need an energy bill that encourages consumption.” – Sept. 23, 2002
In case you missed it … In its tireless effort to provide news and giggles for its readers, All Hat No Cattle offers this Monday glimpse back at the previous week with an emphasis on the weekend dump. (We mean the time preferred by government officials, politicians and titans of industry to release unsavory news in the hope it receives less media coverage – not the bathroom activity.) Sun. 3-22-09
Biker gangs offer security
services at concerts, bars, airports
Police said a group of suspected gang members was ambushed as they disembarked from an airplane. "A fight ensued, the fight moved through various parts of the terminal," said Police Detective Inspector Peter Williams. He said 15 men were involved in the violence, which rampaged from the ground floor up one level to the departures hall before most of the men fled. Williams said one man died in a hospital from head injuries after the brawl, which appeared to bear out warnings of an impending biker war in Sydney.
Four men were arrested, Williams said. The others escaped, some of them by
hailing taxis, local media reported.
Lethal air pollution in Asia, South America might hurt tourism GENEVA (AFP) – International experts are warning that potentially lethal air pollution has boomed in fast-growing big cities in Asia and South America in recent decades. While Europe has managed to drastically cut some, but not all, of the most noxious pollutants over the past 20 years, emerging nations experienced the opposite trend with their fast economic growth, scientists at the UN's meteorological agency said Sunday. Their comments came ahead of World Meteorological Day on Monday, which this year has the theme "The Air We Breathe". The World Health Organization estimates that about two million people die prematurely every year as a result of air pollution, while many more suffer from breathing ailments, heart disease, lung infections and even cancer.
Sat., 3-21-09
Lifestyles of the rich and
infamous draw visitors
About 40 protesters — outnumbered by reporters and photographers from as far away as Germany — sought to urge AIG executives who received a portion of the $165 million in bonuses to do more to help families. "We think $165 million could be used in a more appropriate way to keep people in their homes, create more jobs and health care," said Emeline Bravo-Blackport, a gardener. She marveled at AIG executive James Hass' colonial house, which has stunning views of a golf course and the Long Island Sound. The Fairfield house is "another part of the world" from her life in nearby Bridgeport, which flirted with bankruptcy in the 1990s and still struggles with foreclosures and unemployment." "Lord, I wonder what it's like to live in a house that size," she said.
Romania might allow consensual incest – like some parts of U.S. BUCHAREST, Romania (AP) – Surprising as it may seem, incest is not always a crime in Europe. Three European Union nations — France, Spain and Portugal — do not prosecute consenting adults for incest, and Romania is considering following suit. Laws exempting parents, grandparents, brothers and sisters from prosecution for incestuous acts if they are not forced upon adult family members are decades old in France, Spain and Portugal.
In
Romania, decriminalizing incest among consenting adults is being considered as
part of a wide range of reforms to the country's criminal code.
Fri., 3-20-09 The Congressional Budget Office figures, obtained by The Associated Press Friday, predict Obama's budget will produce $9.3 trillion worth of red ink over 2010-2019. That's $2.3 trillion worse than the White House predicted in its budget. Worst of all, CBO says the deficit under Obama's policies would never go below 4 percent of the size of the economy, figures that economists agree are unsustainable. By the end of the decade, the deficit would exceed 5 percent of gross domestic product, a dangerously high level. The latest figures, even worse than expected by top Democrats, throw a major monkey wrench into efforts to enact Obama's budget, which promises universal health care for all and higher spending for domestic programs like education and research into renewable energy.
Wilkerson, who first made the assertions in an Internet posting, told the AP he learned from briefings and by communicating with military commanders that the U.S. soon realized many Guantanamo detainees were innocent but nevertheless held them in hopes they could provide information for a "mosaic" of intelligence. Wilkerson, a retired Army colonel, said vetting on the battlefield during the early stages of U.S. military operations in Afghanistan was incompetent with no meaningful attempt to discriminate "who we were transporting to Cuba for detention and interrogation."
Wed., 3-18-09
Tues., 3-17-09 Benedict arrived in Yaounde, Cameroon's capital, on Tuesday afternoon, greeted by a crowd of flag-waving faithful and snapping cameras. The visit is his first pilgrimage as pontiff to Africa. In his four years as pope, Benedict had never directly addressed condom use, although his position is not new. His predecessor, Pope John Paul II, often said that sexual abstinence — not condoms — was the best way to prevent the spread of the disease. The Roman Catholic Church rejects the use of condoms as part of its overall teaching against artificial contraception. Senior Vatican officials have advocated fidelity in marriage and abstinence from premarital sex as key weapons in the fight against AIDS. About 22 million people in sub-Saharan Africa are infected with HIV, according to UNAIDS. In 2007, three-quarters of all AIDS deaths worldwide were there, as well as two-thirds of all people living with HIV.
The doors to two groups of cells didn't lock, but apparently no one tried to escape — perhaps because they had everything they needed inside. The jailhouse escapades — some of which date to 2006, according to authorities — have rocked Montague (pronounced mahn-TAYG), a farming and ranching town of several hundred people near the Oklahoma line, about 65 miles northwest of Fort Worth. There were whispers in the past year about an affair between a female jailer and male inmate, but folks dismissed the rumors as small-town gossip. It was not until late last month, when a Texas grand jury returned a 106-count indictment against the former sheriff and 16 others, that the inmates-gone-wild scandal broke wide open.
Odd News To Help You Deflate Photo
An handout rendering shows the Chicago Spire (2nd L). The planned 150-story Chicago Spire would be 2,000 feet tall (610 m) if it gets built atop its completed foundation, ranking the tower the tallest in the Western Hemisphere and the sixth-tallest among the world's planned skyscrapers. Photo/Courtesy of Shelbourne Development
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