Monday edition - December 1, 2008





Bush Aides Rush to Enact a Rule Obama Opposes
New York Times - 12-1-08
WASHINGTON - The Labor Department is racing to complete a new rule, strenuously opposed by President-elect Barack Obama, that would make it much harder for the government to regulate toxic substances and hazardous chemicals to which

Obama Names Hillary Clinton to State Post
Washington Post, United States - 12-1-08
Obama also announced that Bush's defense secretary, Robert M. Gates, has agreed to remain in the job in the new administration, providing continuity while

India clears last Mumbai siege site
The Associated Press -12-1-08
MUMBAI, India (AP) - As authorities finished removing bodies Monday from the bullet- and grenade-scarred Taj Mahal hotel, a Muslim graveyard refused to bury nine gunmen who terrorized this city over three days last week, leaving at least 172 people


A president with an MBA and a CEO for vice president, and what did we get? A financial mess. Barack Obama may not prevent America from sinking, but it was Capt. Bush who was asleep at the wheel for eight dreadful years and landed us on the rocks.



The-World-Will-Be-A-Safer-Place-Without George W. Bush


Surprise, Surprise



The Bush administration backed off proposed crackdowns on no-money-down, interest-only mortgages years before the economy collapsed, buckling to pressure from some of the same banks that have now failed. It ignored remarkably prescient warnings that foretold the financial meltdown, according to an Associated Press review of regulatory documents.


Irony Has At Least Seven More Lives
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Obama’s election’s to blame
For irony’s death, many claim.
Is there nothing to mock?
To satirically knock?
Spoof the press and the pundits — I’m game.

And there’s always the cowardly Dems,
And obstreperous GOP “gems,”
Greedy banks, AIG,
CEOs, bad TV.
Start lampooning — no haws and no hems.




Disturbing News


Barack Obama’s people are trying to lower expectations for the new Obama administration, you know, because everybody thinks he’s going to be able to fix things all at once. So the expectations are very high, but if they want to lower expectations, quit hiring the Clinton people and keep some of those Bush people on. - Jay Leno


Ann Coulter Got Wired



Hard-right firebrand Ann Coulter, who fell a few weeks ago and reportedly broke her jaw, is having her jaw wired shut






I think you've got a great satirical site that is not only relevant and needed regardless of what political clime we are in, but it's also an obvious pleasure and creative release for you, and I'm happy to support it.

Over the years your site has served as a reminder that not all Americans were swallowing the obvious lies and fear-mongering that was being pounded into your brain on an almost daily basis. You reminded visitors to your site that there were some patriotic Americans like yourself who remembered that your loyalty should not lay with the transient figures that hold office, but foremost to your country and the ideals that it was founded upon. Some of you remembered your duty to defend her from all enemies from without and within, and my hat goes off to you for doing YOUR duty in your own unique fashion.

You took it upon yourself to speak out when it was dangerously unpopular to do so, particularly during the first few months of the Iraq invasion while the bombs were flying and Saddam was still on the run. You were expected to shut your mouth, support your troops and agree with the talking heads on FOX "NEWS". As a good citizen does in times of conflict, you got behind your troops and supported them 100%. But you refused to shut your mouth and continued to speak out against the wrongs being perpetrated, and that takes a certain kind of courage which I greatly admire. Again, hats off to you.

The stink of the Bush administration still hangs heavy in the air, but it's getting better. Barack Obama. Wow. I'm jealous.

Keep tweaking noses,

Nick :-) P.S. Sarah Palin scares me in ways I cannot easily describe, or why. Maybe it's because I don't trust the intentions of someone who's convinced they're going to see the Second Coming of Jesus in their lifetime, and says it with the sort of gleeful smile and insane light in their eyes that is reminiscent of the kind that Charles Manson's followers had on their face when they described their love for him. Did I go too far will that allusion? I don't think so.


Thank you for the wonderful email and your generous support.


I have been away from all of the Internets since Tuesday. I was helping my 85 year old mother in Ft Lauderdale, FL -- she sustained water damage in her den. I also spent Thanksgiving at my cousins in Palm Beach with about 10 other people.


The den repairs turned out to be more pleasant than Thanksgiving.

I broke Thanksgiving bread with active members of the Palm Beach Republican Party. Shoot me now and put me out of my misery so I don't have to relive that day.


What I learned from this GOP "hierarchy" was that Bill Clinton caused the collapse of Enron, all lawyers are corrupt and that all college professors in this country are communists and so am I.


Yes, Nick, Sarah is scary but her followers are scarier.


Again, thank you for your kind words. Big hug.


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Republican-Shenanigans News





Al Qaeda has declared war on the Somali pirates. That is awesome! Evil against evil. Like Alien versus Predator or Cheney versus his lawyer. - Craig Ferguson

Rock-The-Voter News



President-elect Barack Obama announced his new economic team. You know what he should do? Hire those people who were in charge of his fundraising campaign. We can pay this thing off in like a week. - Jay Leno


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Biz-Tech News

New Business Opportunities



An Internet firm specializing in crystal balls, tarot readings, I-ching and horoscopes is raking in business as Japanese seek reassurance about the future in the midst of a global financial crisis.

Fears of job cuts and an economy in meltdown have boosted business at Zappallas Inc, which operates Japan's largest network of fortune-telling websites, including "Your Future in Three Months" and "Certain Fate."





"I tell you, the economy is bad. In fact, today -- you know the White House turkey? Turned down the pardon. Said all his money's in the market. Nothing left to live for." --Jay Leno


Bush-Prison-Torture News

Making Smarter Cars Instead of Stupid Decisions

When the Big Three CEOs recently descended on Washington in their fancy corporate jets with inflated egos and high hopes for a juicy piece of the government’s $8.6 trillion corporate welfare pie, they were sent home hungry to do their homework and to write an essay about how they plan to spend bailout funds.


Go-F**k-Yourself News


 “What do I think of Western civilization? I think it would be a very good idea.” - Mahatma Gandhi


"Listen to this, a guy in North Carolina, a mailman, a Federal employee, a postal worker, was arrested and put in jail. You know why? He would deliver regular mail, but he wouldn't deliver junk mail. They got the guy, they arrested him, and they put him in prison. We got that guy, but still no word on bin Laden." --David Letterman





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Odd News


A Fabulous Turkey Recipe forwarded by AHNC viewer Archie


1 whole Turkey (weight is dependant on how many servings are required)
1 large lemon, cut into halves
sprig of rosemary
salt and pepper to taste
butter or olive oil, whichever you prefer
Heat oven to 350 degrees
Rub butter or oil over the skin of the Turkey until it is completely coated

Take a knife and gently separate the skin from the breast meat.
Slide lemon halves under the skin with the peel side up. This way the juice from the lemon will coat the breast. Season skin of the Turkey to your preference, and place sprig of rosemary into it. Cover and place in oven for 2 1/2 - 3 hours.

Remove cover and continue to roast until juices run clear, basting every 15-20 minutes. Total roasting time depends on the size of your bird.

If you've followed these steps correctly, your turkey should look like the one in photo below (scroll down). Bon Appetite!