Wednesday edition - November 8, 2006




Resurgent Democrats Win Control of House
ABC News - 11-8-06
Democrats won control of the House early Wednesday after a dozen years of Republican rule in a resounding repudiation of a war ...

World Sees Dems' Win As A Bush Rejection
Guardian Unlimited, UK - 11-8-06
 Democratic gains in Congress were seen around the world Wednesday as a rejection ...

Rumsfeld resigning, to be replaced by former CIA Director Gates
WMC-TV, TN -11-8-06
Defense Secretary Donald Rumsfeld, architect of an unpopular war in Iraq, intends to resign after six stormy years at the Pentagon ...


Surprise, surprise, democracy still does live here!



"The unemployment rate came out. It's down to 4.4 -- lowest in the world, which is good news for Republicans. That means after tomorrow, they'll be able to find jobs." --Jay Leno





Give 'Em Hell, Nancy! - Grant Gerver


The-World-Is-A-Safer-Place-Without-Saddam News



Geraldo Rivera At Large beat national newscasts Friday, launching the newsman on a huge comeback. It's amazing. Three years ago Geraldo Rivera was one of only four men asked to leave Iraq, the other three being Saddam Hussein and his two sons. - Argus Hamilton, comedian




By Don Davis






Disturbing News




According to a new study, voters are more likely to vote for a candidate with good looks and charisma. If you want proof, just ask that stud Dennis Hastert." --Conan O'Brien


Former President Bill Clinton, on the Republicans' 2006 campaign formula


"It goes something like this: 'OK, we really messed up, I mean this Iraq deal didn't work out too good, now Afghanistan is at risk, and we probably shouldn't have put that horse show association guy in charge of FEMA before Katrina, and you know, it was embarrassing when our senior White House aide that dealt with Mr. Abramoff had to go to prison, but Karl Rove didn't know him very well, he only had 485 contacts with the White House, and he's shy, Karl is, you've got to know him 486 times before he knows you. But what the heck, we're in power. What's the law? Yeah, we've got a lot of problems, but you still have to vote for us 'cause my opponent is a slug, and they're going to tax you into the poorhouse. On the way to the poorhouse, you'll meet a terrorist on every street corner. And when you try to run away from that terrorist, you will trip over an illegal immigrant.'"  Click here for the video




Republican Shenanigans



Access Hollywood host and presidential cousin Billy Bush was hired by NBC to host a talent show. Its goal is to find two stars for a Broadway revival of the musical Grease. By now everybody's conditioned to hire the Bush Family whenever a contest involves oil. -- Argus Hamilton, comedian





The President's Got No Clue!

By Patrick Mackeown


A British perspective



Bush Eavesdropping Update


A federal appeals court agreed Tuesday to review a lower court's ruling that kept alive a lawsuit challenging President Bush's domestic eavesdropping program...The lawsuit, brought by the Electronic Frontier Foundation, challenges President Bush's assertion that he can use his wartime powers to eavesdrop on Americans without a warrant. It accuses AT&T Inc. of illegally making communications on its networks available to the National Security Agency without warrants.


Rock-The-Voter News


“The Democrats are favored to win most races. As a matter of fact, the only Republican in Washington whose seat is safe is Lincoln.”-- David Letterman



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Montana Goes Blue - Waiting for Macaca to Graciously Concede


Democrats erased the Republican Senate majority Wednesday with a cliffhanger victory in Montana, hours after taking control of the House. The battle for Senate control came down to Virginia, where Democrats held a small lead.



Biz/Tech News




Karl Rove goes into seclusion with Pastor Ted Haggard at Tom DeLay's villa Grant Gerver


Bush-Prison-Torture News





 “During the election, you know what Vice President Dick Cheney wass doing? He is going to spend the day hunting at his lodge in South Dakota. Isn't that unbelievable? That's the one place you want to be if the Republicans lose, Cheney with a gun.” -- Jay Leno


Go-F***-Yourself News




You guys are worried about elections when BRITNEY HAS JUST FILED FOR DIVORCE?! -- Grant Gerver




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Odd News




A polar bear moons Bush on the tundra near Churchill, Manitoba, Canada, Friday, Nov. 3, 2006. The bears are slowly congregating along the coast, anticipating the winter freeze-up of Hudson Bay. When the bay freezes, the polar bears can get onto the ice to hunt their favorite meal, ringed seal. (Photo/CP, Jonathan Hayward)