November 14,  2003  TGIF

US to stay beyond Iraq handover
BBC News, UK - 11-14-03
The United States says its troops will stay in Iraq until democracy is established there - and beyond the transfer of political power to Iraqis...

GI mourned in non-military funeral
Chicago Sun Times - 11-14-03

...''George Bush killed my son,'' Rosemary Dietz Slavenas said. ''I believe my son Brian died not for his country but because of our country's lack of a coherent and civilized foreign policy."...

US stays blind to Iraqi casualties
Boston Globe, MA - 11-14-03

THE WHITE HOUSE always said it would never count how many Iraqi parents we killed to liberate their children. We would never count how many toddlers we blew to pieces to free their elders...


Is bloody Iraq oil regular grade or premium grade?.


The Deepening Quagmire
New London Day - CT -11-14-03
...Just after the U.S. invaded Iraq, 43 percent of Iraqis polled said the Americans were liberators. Today, only 15 percent hold that opinion and 67 percent say the U.S. forces are occupiers...




An oxymoron: "The George W. Bush Presidential Library"

Use it as you see fit.



Dear Oracle,

Hahaha.  How true. Bush admits not reading the newspaper, magazines or books. I'd bet the ranch that he can't spell. Thanks for the inspiration.

See below.








"Yesterday President Bush met with his foreign policy advisors to discuss a way to give power back to Iraqis by finding a powerful leader that Iraqis know and respect. Surprisingly, the only name President Bush could come up with was Saddam Hussein." —Conan O'Brien

GOP Leader Solicits Money for Charity Tied to Convention
New York Times - 11-14-03
It is an unusual charity brochure: a 13-page document, complete with pictures of fireworks and a golf course, that invites potential donors to give as much as $500,000 to spend time with Tom DeLay during the Republican convention in New York City next summer — and to have part of the money go to help abused and neglected children....


Delay reminds me of the creepy shoe salesman who holds onto your foot just a little too long.


Subject: From your British correspondent - GW assured of a 'warm' welcome in England


We're a gettin' ready to welcome your illustrious president, the big
day is next Thursday. They tried to do a 'Washington' and close lots of the
roads in London to protect W from the eggs, smelly cabbages etc that we have
been saving for him for some time. The British public and the BBC are
insisting that closures are kept to the minimum. I don't think we will see the 1
Million plus that we had last year (the biggest ever demo on anything
in England), but it should be a pretty good show. If we can grab W and put
him in the stocks that will be very satisfactory.

We love decent Americans here, but we really hate your president and
his agenda

Have a look at:-

Guess where I'll be on Thursday !

If you have got any ideas for a banner - please send it.


Dear Alan,

Always a pleasure to hear from you.  Toss a rotten tomato for me! Here in the land of the free, people aren't allowed to protest "freely" anymore. Jeb Bush has sure changed Florida--no protesting, no vote counting. See picture and newspaper article below.

Miami law boosts police powers to arrest protesters at trade ...
Fort Lauderdale Sun Sentinel, FL - 11-14-03

Protesters Arrested Ahead Of Free Trade Summit
WPBF, FL - 11-13-03

Here are some banner ideas--

Bush: All Hat No Cattle

Bush is proof that empty warheads can be dangerous.

Let's bomb Texas, they have oil too.

How did our oil get under their sand?

If you can't pronounce it, don't bomb it.

Daddy, can I start the war now?

1000 points of light and one dim bulb.

Sacrifice our SUV's, not our children.

Preemptive impeachment.

No George, I said Mac Attack.

Look, I'll pay more for gas!

It's the stupid economy.

Draft Richard Perle.

Draft dodgers shouldn't start wars.

I bet my fabulous viewers can come up some great banner ideas!

Enter your banner ideas below and I will pass them on to Alan in England and I'll send out stickers to the winners!


Just want to see if you're paying attention.


Let's see now ... in the weeks following the Calli-forn-ya recall election, the state has suffered wildfires that destroyed thousands of acres of forests and hundreds of homes. Now a foot of hail blankets parts of So. Cal. Next week will it be locusts or frogs falling from the heavens? All this indicates to me that, doggone it, God is pissed!

   Thanks to

"Rush Limbaugh announced that he is going back to work Monday — assuming that he passes the urine test. Actually he went to that rehab thing, when he comes back he could have his bigger audience ever. Because besides just the ditto heads, he could have the crack heads, the dead heads, the coke heads."
—Jay Leno

Top Ten Signs Rush Limbaugh Might Not Be Ready To Come Back To Work- David Lettermen

10. "Accidentally" falls down stairs 2, 3 times a day to get the pain pills

9. Named his two new puppies "Oxy" and "Contin"

8. Keeps going up to the roof to see if he can fly like that guy from "The Matrix"

7. Thoroughly enjoyed last night's "Becker"

6. He's currently following Phish around the Pacific northwest

5. Responds to all callers, "Here, kitty kitty kitty kitty kitty"

4. Could swear he saw sheep being herded down Broadway

3. Yesterday he did a three hour show into the drive-thru speaker at Jack in the Box

2. These days, only 80% blowhard

1. Released amateur sex video making love to himself


Limbaugh to resume hosting show
The Collegiate Times, VA - 11-14-03
Rush Limbaugh has been off the air since Oct. 10, when he acknowledged
he abused painkillers. by Jill Barton. WEST PALM BEACH, Fla. ...



Count the Republican Elephant's legs.

Bush's Brain Scan

George W. Bush went to see the doctor to get the results of his brain scan. The doctor said: "Mr. President, I have some bad news for you. First, we have discovered that your brain has two sides: the left side and the right side."

Bush interrupted, "Well, that's normal, isn't it? I thought everybody had two sides to their brain?"

The doctor replied, "That's true, Mr. President. But your brain is very unusual because on the left side there isn't anything right, while on the right side there isn't anything left."

The Prince Charles Sex Scandal


Get the full details. There is one slight catch however. There always is.






Evidence of Ancient Martian Rivers. "Meanders are key, unequivocal evidence that some valleys on early Mars held persistent flows of water over considerable periods of time," said Dr. Michael Malin of Malin Space Science Systems, San Diego, which supplied and operates the spacecraft's Mars Orbiter Camera. Photo Credit: (NASA)