Wednesday edition - November 12, 2008





Obama team announces ethics policy
The Miami Herald, FL - 11-12-08
 WASHINGTON -- President-elect Barack Obama's transition team announced ethics guidelines Tuesday to keep federal lobbyists at arms' length...


Lobbyists Swarm the Treasury for a Helping of the Bailout Pie
New York Times, United States - 11-12-08
WASHINGTON — When the government said it would spend $700 billion to rescue the nation’s financial industry

Iraq Signs $3.5 Billion Deal for China to Develop Oil Field
New York Times, United States - 11-12-08
BAGHDAD - North Oil, an Iraqi-owned company, has signed a contract with a Chinese state-owned oil corporation, CNPC, that was first


"But I'm no pundit. I don't know anything about politics, but as soon as Barack Obama shook hands with President Bush, Obama's ratings went down 10 points." --David Letterman



The-World-Will-Be-A-Safer-Place-Without George W. Bush

"There was a little confusion at the meeting there at the White House when President Bush was told that Obama was coming. He said oh, you mean we caught him?" --David Letterman

Back In The USSR


Russia has rejected U.S. proposals seeking to ease its concerns about a missile defense system that Washington plans to deploy in Europe, local news agencies on Wednesday quoted a Kremlin source as saying.



Disturbing News




"And then today, the big transition process begins, because earlier today, Barack Obama met with President Bush at the White House. So you had the president-elect and the president-inept, so they were there together." --David Letterman



Premature Evacuation Prevention



After an F-bomb dropped on "Morning Joe," the MSNBC news-talk show has installed an early-warning system.

A seven-second delay was added with Tuesday's broadcast, to protect against future eruptions such as that of host Joe Scarborough, who seemed to surprise even himself with his verboten utterance.

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Republican-Shenanigans News



Creepy Congressman Reappears



Even today, two years after Mark Foley's very public fall from grace, the former congressman can't explain why he sent lurid, sexually explicit computer messages to male teens who had worked as Capitol Hill pages.


A FABULOUS short and sweet interview with Sarah Palin and John McCain - YouTube



"And the controversy continuing over those clothes she bought, or the Republicans bought, or the Republicans want the clothes back. Do you know this story? I say, let Sarah Palin keep the clothes. She can have the clothes. What are a bunch of male Republicans going to do with a bunch of women's clothes? I guess that's kind of creepy." --Jay Leno





Rock-The-Voter News


"Well, according to a new post-election survey, people want Sarah Palin to run for president in 2012. That's what it says. It says she's been getting thousands of calls from people pleading with her to run, all Democrats." --Jay Leno





"Barack Obama attended a parent-teacher conference at his daughters' school the other day. And a very positive meeting. The teacher said, both the girls already reading at a President Bush level." --Jay Leno



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Biz-Tech News

AIG Gone Wild


A key Democratic lawmaker called Tuesday for the resignation of American International Group's CEO after the troubled insurer held a financial planners conference last week at a posh Arizona resort.




Round and Round We Go, Where We Stop, Nobody Knows



Treasury Secretary Henry Paulson said Wednesday the $700 billion government rescue program will not be used to purchase troubled assets as originally planned.



"According to the New York Daily News, a New Jersey City Councilman named Steve Lipski got so drunk at a Grateful Dead tribute band concert -- not even the Grateful Dead, a Grateful Dead tribute band concert -- he urinated off the balcony of the nightclub onto the people below. A politician urinating on people. Or, as Senator Larry Craig calls that, foreplay" --Jay Leno




Bush-Prison-Torture News


We could save the IRS a lot of money by just flushing our tax dollars down our own toilets. - Grant Gerver



"Everybody seems to be ganging up on Sarah Palin lately. Have you noticed that? Oh, boy. Now, when she goes hunting, the moose return fire. That's how bad it's gotten." --Jay Leno


Go-F**k-Yourself News



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Odd News




The mechanical design of Philips Research's intelligent pill (iPill) in the form of an 11 x 26 mm capsule is seen in this undated handout illustration. Dutch group Philips has developed an 'intelligent pill' that contains a microprocessor, battery, wireless radio, pump and a drug reservoir to release medication in a specific area in the body. Philips, one of the world's biggest hospital equipment makers, said on November 11, 2008 that the 'iPill' capsule, measures acidity with a sensor to determine its location in the gut, and can then release drugs where they are needed.