Tuesday edition - November 11, 2008




World marks end of 'war to end all wars'
CNN -11-11-08

(CNN) -- The handful of surviving World War I veterans will be celebrated Tuesday as part of 90th anniversary commemorations of the conflict that was meant to "end all wars...


US Bishops Urged to Challenge Obama
New York Times, United States 
BALTIMORE — The president of the United States Conference of Catholic Bishops told his fellow prelates Monday that while they should

Iraq and Afghanistan Veterans Gain a Powerful Voice: Their Own
Washington Post, United States -11-11-08
Some lobbyists come to Capitol Hill armed with PowerPoint presentations and Excel spreadsheets. Todd Bowers brought the rifle scope


"Americans have finally got beyond our racial past, and picked a black man to clean up our mess." -Bill Maher



The-World-Is-A-Safer-Place-Without George W. Bush


Today in History - Nov. 11


In 1620, 41 Pilgrims aboard the Mayflower, anchored off Massachusetts, signed a compact calling for a "body politick."




"Did you see Obama's news conference today? Wow. I have to say, nice to see adults back in charge of government. The White House press corps, you could tell, they were ecstatic. It's been years since they've heard a complete sentence." -Bill Maher




Disturbing News


"And this is sad, you hate hearing about this, but staffers are saying that John McCain is depressed. And I think there is something true to the story, because I heard today that he had made an appointment with Joe the therapist." --David Letterman


Stop The Baptizing the Jews, Already!


Holocaust survivors said Monday they are through trying to negotiate with the Mormon church over posthumous baptisms of Jews killed in Nazi concentration camps, saying the church has repeatedly violated a 13-year-old agreement barring the practice.



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Republican-Shenanigans News

Ballot Insecurity



St. Louis County keeps election ballots in the courthouse attic. Anoka County keeps them locked in the basement. Hennepin County relies on its cities to keep ballots safe.

The lack of a uniform standard for counties safeguarding ballots after the election could come into play when those votes are recounted in Minnesota's U.S. Senate race.


"And according to a federal report, unemployment claims went up by 300,000. And that's just Republicans in Washington." --Jay Leno




Rock-The-Voter News


"We found out that the Mormons are the ones that financed this thing against Prop 8. They spent $20 million on Prop 8, because they say that marriage should be between a man and his multiple child brides." --Bill Maher




"Of course, everybody now is speculating what the future of the GOP will be. GOP now stands for, of course, 'Ganging up on Palin.'" --Jay Leno

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Biz-Tech News


"Been a lot of stories from Germany about how America has come to terms with its past and is beginning to make up for it. Now look. I know our country is not perfect, but we do a pretty good job working out our problems. Do we need a lecture from Germany? When they elect a Jewish chancellor, give me a call. Okay?" --Jay Leno




Bush-Prison-Torture News

Republican Gone Nuts



A Republican congressman from Georgia said Monday he fears that President-elect Obama will establish a Gestapo-like security force to impose a Marxist dictatorship.



Barack the Plumber



"It was revealed that Dick Cheney, we haven't seen much this week, spent Election Day in South Dakota, shooting peasants, I mean, pheasants." --Jay Leno

Go-F**k-Yourself News


"The effects of the Barack Obama election win are still reverberating throughout the country. A lot of pride in the African-American community. Have you noticed that? And listen to the latest rumor. You hear about this? ... Michael Jackson now considering going back to being a black guy." --Jay Leno








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Odd News




A male sea spider carries its eggs on specially adapted appendages under its body in this undated handout. It is one of many possible new species from the Antarctic. The $650 million 'Census of Marine Life' is on track for completion in 2010, assessing about 230,000 known marine species, a statement said. It has identified 5,300 likely new species, of everything from fish or corals. So far, 110 have been confirmed as new. Photo/Cedric d'Udekem, Royal Belgium Institute for Natural Sciences