Tuesday edition - October 28, 2008




Iraq denounces US raid on Syria
Reuters - 10-28-08
BAGHDAD (Reuters) - Iraq's government denounced on Tuesday a US air strike on the Syrian border, but also called for a halt to what it said was insurgent..


Alaska's Ted Stevens found guilty on all 7 counts
The Miami Herald, FL - 10-28-08
WASHINGTON — A federal jury on Monday found Republican Sen. Ted Stevens guilty on seven counts of lying about thousands

Consumer confidence plunges to lowest on record
The Associated Press - 10-28-08
That's the lowest level for the index since the Conference Board began tracking consumer sentiment in 1967, and the third-steepest drop


"So, just to recap here, the Republican National Committee took money from hardworking Americans, right? They spent it on designer clothes and glasses and handbags for Sarah Palin, so she could go out there on the stump and stop that bastard Obama from spreading the wealth." --Bill Maher





The-World-Is-A-Safer-Place-Without Saddam

Guilty As Charged



Republican presidential candidate John McCain called Tuesday for Alaska Sen. Ted Stevens to step down in the aftermath of his felony convictions in a federal corruption case, saying the longtime Republican "has broken his trust with the people."

A jury on Monday found Stevens, 84, guilty on seven counts of trying to hide more than $250,000 in free home renovations and other gifts from a wealthy oil contractor.



Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad is rumored to be ill. And he’s in the hospital today. His condition has been downgraded from serious to ugly.
But they say Ahmadinejad is exhausted from overwork. And you know, thank God that will never happen to George Bush. -
David Letterman



Disturbing News





 Texas officials accused the Federal Emergency Management Agency of slow response and insensitivity on Monday, saying the agency has failed to provide timely help to town officials and Hurricane Ike victims who need temporary housing and money.


Alaska’s largest newspaper has endorsed Barack Obama despite the fact that their governor is Sarah Palin. Luckily for Palin, it’s one of the 500 newspapers she doesn’t read. - Conan O'Brien



McCain Cancels - Obama Doesn't


Dressed in blue jeans and a black jacket, Barack Obama braved the cold rain falling in Pennsylvania, and held his scheduled rally - outdoors. “A little bit of rain never hurt anybody,” he quipped to the 9,000 who showed up in ponchos and futilely holding umbrellas.

Just an hour away in Quakertown, the rival ticket cancelled their own outdoor rally due to inclement weather. Unfazed, Obama incorporated the conditions into his speech


Ads by Google






Republican-Shenanigans News

White Tuxedos and Top Hats


In a rural Tennessee county where you can't buy alcohol or even find a Wal-Mart, residents of tiny Bells stopped each other to ask if anyone knew the pale-skinned young local accused of plotting to kill dozens of black people, including Barack Obama...The killing spree was initially to target a predominantly black school, which was not identified in court documents. It was to end, authorities said, with the two suspects — dressed in white tuxedos and top hats — blasting guns from the windows of a speeding vehicle aimed at Obama.


"According to expense reports, Sarah Palin charged the state of Alaska over $21,000 for her children to travel with her on official business. In fairness to Governor Palin, when she leaves them home alone, they get pregnant." --Seth Meyers




Top Ten Sarah Palin Excuses For Spending $150,000 On Clothes

10. "Need to look good for the Russians who can see me in Alaska"

9. "The old man spends more on Polident"

8. "Auditioning to be Paris Hilton's BFF"

7. "Wanted to impress the American voters in the evening gown competition"

6. "Maverick, Joe the plumber, maverick, maverick, William Ayers, you betcha!"

5. "I fell for the liberal retailers' 'gotcha sales tactics'"

4. "Because the dollar is so weak, it's really like I only spent $50,000"

3. "Hmm...excuses? I'll find some and I'll get right back to ya!"

2. "In addition to every newspaper and magazine, I also read every catalog"

1. "The difference between a hockey mom and a pit bull: lipstick, Prada shoes, a Gucci handbag, and a few $3,000 suits"


Rock-The-Voter News


"On top of that, in turns out the highest-paid person in the McCain campaign? Not the campaign manager, not the pollsters: Palin's makeup artist. I'm not kidding. The highest-paid person, she flies to every city where Palin appears. And McCain? He just gets the local gal who does the funeral home. No, it's not as bad as it sounds. The makeup girl is also Palin's top foreign policy adviser." --Bill Maher

Ads by Google



Biz-Tech News


There is no truth to the rumor that Alan Greenspan has been ordered to change his name to Alan Redspan. - Laugh Lines




A View From The Other Side Of The Pond


How was it allowed to happen? How did politics in the US come to be dominated by people who make a virtue out of ignorance? Was it charity that has permitted mankind's closest living relative to spend two terms as president? How did Sarah Palin, Dan Quayle and other such gibbering numbskulls get to where they are? How could Republican rallies in 2008 be drowned out by screaming ignoramuses insisting that Barack Obama was a Muslim and a terrorist?



"The campaign says they needed to make Sarah Palin seem hip and cool," but "I'm thinking if you're going to spend money trying to make somebody look hip and cool, what about John? What about spending some money on John?" - Craig Ferguson


Bush-Prison-Torture News


"To top it all off for the week, apparently Sarah Palin accessorized her wardrobe with some ignorance this week. She was asked a question by a third-grader, and she got it wrong. She apparently still does not know what the vice president does. The job she is running for. She said he or she runs the Senate. No, not in this country. You know, George Bush, I would never accuse him of being a bright man, but when he was elected, he at least knew what building to show up to." --Bill Maher




Go-F**k-Yourself News


I hope you had a good time today.


Please help keep All Hat No Cattle online

 Amazon Honor System Click Here to Pay Learn More

Offline Donation - Lisa Casey - PO Box 88 - Ashford, AL 36312



Email All Hat No Cattle


Odd News



Food for thought. Credit/ http://www.wambie.com/foto_br-272.html