October 20, 2004 Wednesday Edition



Number of U.S. troops wounded in Iraq war tops 8,000
Boston Globe, 10-20-04
WASHINGTON (AP) -- The number of U.S. troops wounded in Iraq since military operations began in March 2003 has topped the 8,000 mark, according to figures released ...



Cheney: Terrorists May Bomb U.S. Cities

AP, 10-20-04

Vice President Dick Cheney on Tuesday raised the possibility of terrorists bombing U.S. cities with nuclear weapons ...


Americans Going to Canada for Flu Shots

AP, 10-20-04

With a shortage of flu vaccine across the country, Margaret Holmen and others from the Powers Lake Senior Citizens Center ...


Twelve days till Kerry wins.

“I guess you've heard there's now a flu vaccine shortage. We only have half the amount necessary. How does this happen? How come we never run out of crack?”  -- Jay Leno


“Oil has now hit $55 a barrel. Don't we occupy the biggest oil field in the world now? Didn't Michael Moore say Bush had this relationship with the Saudis? Isn't gas supposed to be a nickel now?” -- Jay Leno

The-World-Is-A-Safer-Place-Without-Saddam News

 Click Here for a funny voting machine animation

Electoral College Update

Here are the latest electoral vote tallies which are updated daily (270 needed to win):

·                                 Electoral Vote Predictor: Kerry 284, Bush 247

·                                 The Hotline: Bush 227, Kerry 214

·                                 2.004k.com: Kerry 289, Bush 232

·                                 Slate: Kerry 284, Bush 254

·                                 Race 2004: Kerry 218, Bush 205

·                                 MyDD: Kerry 316, Bush 222


“Welcome to the Tonight Show. What a crowd. Man, you sound like Al Franken when he heard about Bill O’Reilly.”  -- Jay Leno

Disturbing News


Pat Robertson – Televangelist Diamond Miner

CNN, 10-20-04

"And I warned him about this war. I had deep misgivings about this war, deep misgivings. And I was trying to say, 'Mr. President, you had better prepare the American people for casualties.' "

Robertson said the president then told him, "Oh, no, we're not going to have any casualties."

 Republican Shenanigans

"Lynne Cheney, Vice President Dick Cheney's wife and the former head of the National Endowment for the Humanities, has placed herself in the company of dictators and slaveholders. At her urging, the Education Department destroyed more than 300,000 copies of a booklet designed to help parents and children learn more about America's past."
–- Steven Ross, Los Angeles Times Columnist

"I just thought he was lame and out of his depth. Completely banal. He didn't tell me anything I haven't heard from drunk people in airport bars." -- CNN "Crossfire" host TUCKER CARLSON, quoted in The Philadelphia Inquirer regarding his on-the-air spat with "Daily Show" host JON STEWART, who insulted Tucker's bow tie and called him a bad word.

Biz/Tech News

Proud Republican Days In History -- October 20

In 1947, the House Un-American Activities Committee opened hearings into alleged Communist influence and infiltration within the American motion picture industry.

In 1973, in the so-called "Saturday Night Massacre," special Watergate prosecutor Archibald Cox was dismissed and Attorney General Elliot L. Richardson and Deputy Attorney General William B. Ruckelshaus resigned.

Bush-Prison-Torture News

“First, Mike Wallace had that run-in with the limo driver, and they took him to jail. Then Dan Rather gets caught with a fake memo. Now Bill O’Reilly being sued for sexual harassment. Do you realize the most trusted newsman in America is now Geraldo Rivera?” -- Jay Leno

Go-F*** -Yourself News

Kerry/Edwards News

This is a Gallup poll -- from October 27, 2000:

Bush 53 %
Gore 39 %
Nader 4 %
Buchanan 1%

 While not a prediction of the voters' choice in November, Friday's results show Bush garnering 52 percent of the vote and Gore drawing 39 percent. The survey of 851 likely voters was conducted October 24-26 and has a 3.5 percentage point margin of error.

A CNN/Time poll also released today gives Bush a 49 percent to 43 percent edge over Gore, which is statistically in agreement with today's CNN/USA Today/Gallup tracking poll, given the polls' margin of sampling error...

“We're coming down to the elections, and they are just around the corner. And all that really is left now is the last minute tinkering with the voting machines in Florida.” -- David Letterman

Non-political joke


After 17 years of marriage, a man dumped his wife for his young secretary.
His new girlfriend demanded to live in the couple's multimillion-dollar home, and since the man's lawyers were a little
better, he prevailed.
He gave his now ex-wife just 3 days to move out.
She spent the first day packing her belongings into boxes, crates and suitcases.
On the second day, she had the movers come and collect her things.
On the third day, she sat down for the last time at their beautiful dining room table by candlelight, put on some soft background music,
and feasted on a pound of shrimp, a jar of caviar, and a bottle of Chardonnay.
When she had finished, she went into each and every room and deposited a few half-eaten shrimp shells, dipped in caviar, into the hollow of the curtain rods. She then cleaned up the kitchen and left.
When the husband returned with his new girlfriend, all was bliss for the first few days. Then slowly, the house began to smell. They tried everything -- cleaning and mopping and airing the place out. Vents were checked for dead rodents, and carpets were steam cleaned. Air fresheners were hung everywhere.
Exterminators were brought in to set off gas canisters, during which they had to move out for a few days, and in the end they even paid to replace the expensive wool carpeting.
Nothing worked. People stopped coming over to visit. Repairmen refused to work in the house. The maid quit.
Finally, they could not take the stench any longer and decided to move.
A month later, even though they had cut their price in half, they could not find a buyer for their stinky house. Word got out, and
eventually, even the local realtors refused to return their calls.
Finally, they had to borrow a huge sum of money from the bank to purchase a new place.
The ex-wife called the man, and asked how things were going. He told her the saga of the rotting house. She listened politely, and said
that she missed her old home terribly and would be willing to reduce her divorce settlement in exchange for getting the house back.
Knowing his ex-wife had no idea how bad the smell was, he agreed on a price that was about 1/10th of what the house had been worth, but only if she were to sign the papers that very day. She agreed, and within the hour, his lawyers delivered the paperwork.
A week later, the man and his new girlfriend stood smirking as they watched the moving company pack everything to take to their new home -- including the curtain rods.

Fahrenheit  911  For Free. Compliments of Michael Moore!

Odd News

Do not try this at home. Shaolin monk Shi Niliang demonstrates the art of "Qigong" as he meditates while hanging by the neck for nearly a minute at his martial arts school in Quanzhou in southeast China's Fujian province.